the benefit of the judge and the
jury, you will please step down here and, with me for the subject,
illustrate just how hard you mean."

Owing to the unmerciful badgering which the witness had just been
through, the prosecutor thought that the young man would perhaps
overdo the matter to get back at him, and thus incriminate himself.

The defendant descended as per schedule, and approached the waiting
attorney. When he reached him the spectators were astonished to see
him slap the lawyer in the face, kick him in the shins, seize him
bodily, and, finally, with a supreme effort, lift him from the floor
and hurl him prostrate across a table.

Turning from the bewildered prosecutor, he faced the court and
explained mildly:

"Your honor and gentlemen, about one-tenth that hard!"

An aged negro was crossing-tender at a spot where an express train
made quick work of a buggy and its occupants. Naturally he was the
chief witness, and the entire case hinged upon the energy with which
he had displayed his warning signal.

A gruelling cross-examination left Rastus unshaken in this story:
The night was dark, and he had waved his lantern frantically, but the
driver of the carriage paid no attention to it.

Later, the division superintendent called the flagman to his office to
compliment him on the steadfastness with which he stuck to his story.

"You did wonderfully, Rastus," he said. "I was afraid at first you
might waver in your testimony."

"Nossir, nossir," Rastus exclaimed, "but I done feared ev'ry minute
that 'ere durn lawyer was gwine ter ask me if mah lantern was
lit."--_Puck_.

During a suit to recover damages following an automobile collision in
the Adirondacks, the complainant's attorney, a city lawyer, constantly
hectored the defendant's principal witness, a rough old guide, but was
unable to shake his testimony.

During cross-examination the guide mentioned "havin' come across the
trail of a Ford." The city lawyer jumped at this chance to discredit
the guide's evidence.

"Do you mean to tell this court," he demanded, "that you can determine
the make of a car by studying its track? How did you know it was a
Ford?"

"Well, sir," drawled the guide, "I followed its trail about a hundred
yards and found a Ford at the end of it."

The magistrate looked severely at the small, red-faced man who had
been summoned before him, and who returned his gaze without flinching.

"So you kicked your landlord downs