A most terrible knave and a bite,
Who cheated his mother,
His sister and brother."--
"O yes," replied More, "that is _Wright_."

CDXXV.--KNOWING HIS MAN.

A MAN was brought before Lord Mansfield, charged with stealing a silver
ladle, and the counsel for the crown was rather severe upon the prisoner
for being an attorney. "Come, come," said his lordship, "don't
exaggerate matters; if the fellow had been an _attorney_, he would have
_stolen the bowl_ as well as the ladle."

CDXXVI.--A SMALL GLASS.

THE manager of a Scotch theatre, at which F.G. Cooke was playing
_Macbeth_, seeing him greatly exhausted towards the close of the
performance, offered him some whiskey in a very small thistle-glass,
saying at the same time, by way of encouragement, "Take that, Mr. Cooke;
take that, sir; it is the real mountain dew; that will never hurt you,
sir!"--"_Not if it was vitriol_!" was the rejoinder.

CDXXVII.--DOMESTIC ECONOMY.

THE following bill of fare (which consists of a dish of fish, a joint of
meat, a couple of fowls, vegetables, and a pudding, being in all seven
dishes for sevenpence!) had its rise in an invitation which a _young_
lady of forty-seven sent to her lover to dine with her on Christmas Day.
To unite taste and economy is no easy thing; but to show her lover she
had learned that difficult art, she gave him the following dinner:--

L s. d.
At top, fish, two herrings 0 0 1
Middle, one ounce and a half of butter,
melted 0 0 0-3/4
Bottom, a mutton chop, divided 0 0 2
On one side, one pound of small potatoes 0 0 0-1/2
On the other side, pickled cabbage 0 0 0-1/2
First remove, two larks, plenty of crumbs 0 0 1-1/2
Mutton removed, French-roll boiled for a
pudding 0 0 0-1/2
Parsley for garnish 0 0 0-1/4
----------
L0 0 7

--Seven dishes for sevenpence!

CDXXVIII.--AN EMPTY HEAD.

OF a light, frivolous, flighty girl, whom Jerrold met frequently, he
said, "That girl has no more head than a periwinkle."

CDXXIX.--A BAD LABEL.

TOM bought a gallon of gin to take home; and, by way of a label, wrote
his name upon a card, which happened to be the seven of