ow its strength. Otherwise, how it would trample upon
us!--D.J.

DCLV.--MAKING A CLEARANCE.

AT Glasgow forty years ago, when the time had come for the _bowl_ to be
introduced, some jovial and thirsty member of the company proposed as a
toast, "The trade of Glasgow and _the outward bound_;" the hint was
taken, and silks and satins moved off to the drawing-room.

DCLVI.--A SMART ONE-POUNDER.

WHILE the "Beggar's Opera" was under rehearsal at the Haymarket Theatre,
in 1823, Miss Paton, who was to play the part of _Polly_, expressed a
wish to sing the air of "The Miser thus a Shilling sees," a note higher;
to which the stage-manager immediately replied, "Then, Miss, you must
sing, 'The Miser thus a _Guinea_ sees.'"

DCLVII.--RESIGNATION.

AN actor, on his benefit night, having a very limited audience, when he
came to the often-quoted passage, "'Tis not in mortals to command
success, We'll do more, Sempronius--we'll deserve it," heaved a deep
sigh, and substituted for the last line, "We'll do more,
Sempronius,--we'll do _without_ it."

DCLVIII.--DELPINI'S REMONSTRANCE.

DELPINI had repeatedly applied to the Prince of Wales to speak to the
Lord Chamberlain to grant him a license for a play at the Little Theatre
in the Haymarket, always pleading poverty: at last, when he once met his
Royal Highness coming out of Carlton House, he exclaimed, "Ah, votre
Altesse! mon Prince! If you do not speak to Milor Chamberlain for pauvre
Delpini, I must go to your _papa's_ bench."

DCLIX.--A PHONETIC JOKE.

A LITTLE girl playing at the game of "I love my love with an A," &c.,
having arrived at the letter Z, displayed her orthographical
acquirements by taking her lover to the sign of the Zebra, and treating
him to _Zeidlitz_ powders.

DCLX.--PURE FOLKS.

VERY pure folks won't be held up to the light and shown to be very dirty
bottles, without paying back hard abuse for the impertinence.

DCLXI.--GOOD NEWS FOR THE CHANCELLOR.

WE have to congratulate the Right Honorable Lord Brougham on the
following piece of intelligence: "_Yarn_ has risen one farthing a
pound." His lordship's long speeches are of course at a premium.--G. a'B.

DCLXII.--JUSTICE NOT ALWAYS BLIND.

WESTMACOTT, of the _Age_ paper, having libelled a gentleman, was well
thrashed for his pains. Declaring afterwards that he would have justice
done him, a person present remarked, "Tha