th Admiral de Winter, was both
laconic and humorous, "Gentlemen, you see a severe _winter_ approaching;
I have only to advise you to keep up a good fire."
TOM DIBDIN'S TOAST.
POOR Tom Dibdin, a convivial, but always a sober man, gives a delicate
allusion to the drinking propensity, in the following toast:--"May the
man who has a good wife, never be addicted to liquor (_lick
her_.)"--_Bentley's Miscellany._
KICKING A YANKEE.
A VERY handsome friend of ours, who a few weeks ago was poked out of a
comfortable office up the river, has taken himself to Bangor for a time
to recover from the wound inflicted upon his feelings by our
"unprincipled and immolating administration."
Change of air must have had an instant effect upon his spirits, for,
from Galena, he writes us an amusing letter, which, among other things,
tells of a desperate quarrel that took place on board of a boat, between
a real live tourist and a real live Yankee settler. The latter trod on
the toes of the former, whereupon the former threatened to "kick out of
the cabin" the latter.
"You'll kick me out of this cabing?"
"Yes, Sir, I'll kick you out of this cabin!"
"You'll kick _me_, Mr. Hitchcock, out of this cabing?"
"Yes, Sir, I'll kick _you_, Mr. Hitchcock!"
"Well, I guess," said the Yankee, very coolly, after being perfectly
satisfied that it was himself that stood in such imminent danger of
assault, "I guess, since you talk of kicking, you've never heard me tell
about old Bradly and my mare to hum?"
"No, Sir, nor do I wish--"
"Wall, guess it won't set you back much, any how, as kicking's generally
best to be considered on. You see old Bradly is one of those
sanctimonious, long-faced hypocrites who put on a religious suit every
Sabbath day morning, and with a good deal of screwing, manage to keep it
on till after sermon in the afternoon; and as I was a Universalist, he
allers picked me out as a subject for religious conversation--and the
darned hypocrite would talk about heaven, and hell, and the devil--the
crucifixion and prayer without ever winking. Wall, he had an old roan
mare that would jump over any fourteen rail fence in Illinois, and open
any door in any barn that hadn't a padlock on it. Tu or three times I
found her in my stable, and I told Bradly about it, and he was 'very
sorry--an unruly animal--would watch'--and a hull lot of such things;
all said in a serious manner, with a face twice as long as old de
|