re _drowned_
in the adjoining bog; and in a very short time nothing was to be _heard_
but _silence_. Their _uniforms_ were _all_ of _different shapes_ and
_colours_--in general they were green. After the action we rummaged
their camp; all we found was a few _pikes without heads_, a parcel of
_empty bottles full_ of water, and a bundle of _blank_ French
commissions _filled up_ with Irishmen's names.

Troops are now stationed every where _round_ the country, which exactly
_squares_ with my ideas. Nothing, however, can save us but a union,
which would turn our _barren hills_ into fruitful _valleys_. I have only
_leisure_ to add, that I am in _great haste_.

Yours truly,
J. B.

P. S. If you do not _receive this in course_, it must have _miscarried_,
therefore _write_ immediately to _let me know_.

THE LOGICIAN REWARDED.

A FARMER'S son, who had been bred at the university, coming home to
visit his parents, a couple of chickens were brought to the table for
supper. "I can prove," said he, "by logic, that these two chickens are
three." "Well, let us hear," said the old man. "This," cried the
scholar, "is one; and this is two; one and two make three." "Very good,"
replied the father, "your mother shall have the first chicken, I will
have the second, and you, for your great learning, shall have the
third."

DOUBLE PUNISHMENT.

THE captain of the Magnanime found it necessary one day to order a negro
on board a flogging. Being tied up, the captain harangued him on his
offence. Quaco, naked and shivering in the month of December, exclaimed,
"Massa! if you preachee, preachee; if you floggee, floggee; but no
preachee and floggee too."

REASON AND A PROVERB EXPLAINED.

IN a party of wits an argument took place as to the definition of a
reasonable animal. Speech was principally contended for; but on this Dr.
Johnson observed, that parrots and magpies speak; were they therefore
rational? "Women," he added, "we know, are rational animals; but would
they be less so if they spoke less?" Jamie Boswell contended that
cookery was the criterion of reason; for that no animal but man did
cook. "That," observed Burke, "explains to me a proverb, which I never
before could understand--_There is reason in the roasting of eggs_."

A GENERAL COMPLAINT.

THE lieutenant colonel of one of the Irish regiments in the French
service being dispatched from Fort Keil by the Duke of Berwick to the
King of France,