could they do?
Said the fly, "let us flee."
"Let us fly," said the flea,
And they flew through a flaw in the flue.

The impression that men will never fly like birds seems to be
aeroneous.--_La Touche Hancock_.

AEROPLANES

"Mother, may I go aeroplane?"
"Yes, my darling Mary.
Tie yourself to an anchor chain
And don't go near the airy."

--_Judge_.

Harry N. Atwood, the noted aviator, was the guest of honor at a dinner
in New York, and on the occasion his eloquent reply to a toast on
aviation terminated neatly with these words:

"The aeroplane has come at last, but it was a long time coming. We can
imagine Necessity, the mother of invention, looking up at a sky all
criss-crossed with flying machines, and then saying, with a shake of her
old head and with a contented smile:

"'Of all my family, the aeroplane has been the hardest to raise.'"

A genius who once did aspire
To invent an aerial flyer,
When asked, "Does it go?"
Replied, "I don't know;
I'm awaiting some damphule to try 'er."

AFTER DINNER SPEECHES

A Frenchman once remarked:

"The table is the only place where one is not bored for the first hour."

Every rose has its thorn
There's fuzz on all the peaches.
There never was a dinner yet
Without some lengthy speeches.

Joseph Chamberlain was the guest of honor at a dinner in an important
city. The Mayor presided, and when coffee was being served the Mayor
leaned over and touched Mr. Chamberlain, saying, "Shall we let the
people enjoy themselves a little longer, or had we better have your
speech now?"

"Friend," said one immigrant to another, "this is a grand country to
settle in. They don't hang you here for murder."

"What do they do to you?" the other immigrant asked.

"They kill you," was the reply, "with elocution."

When Daniel got into the lions' den and looked around he thought to
himself, "Whoever's got to do the after-dinner speaking, it won't be
me."

Joseph H. Choate and Chauncey Depew were invited to a dinner. Mr. Choate
was to speak, and it fell to the lot of Mr. Depew to introduce him,
which he did thus: "Gentlemen, permit me to introduce Ambassador Choate,
America's most inveterate after-dinner speaker. All you need to do to
get a speech out of Mr. Choate is to open his mouth, drop in a dinner
and up comes your speech."

Mr. Choate thanked the Senator for his compliment, and then said: "Mr