y do a bit of time,
And, departing, leave behind us
Thumb-prints in the charts of crime.--_Life_.

Fear follows crime, and is its punishment.--_Voltaire_.

Responsibility prevents crimes.--_Burke_.

If poverty is the mother of crimes, want of sense is the father.--_La
Bruyere_.

But many a crime deemed innocent on earth
Is registered in heaven; and these no doubt
Have each their record, with a curse annex'd.

--_Cowper_.

CRITICISM

A man must serve his time at ev'ry trade,
Save censure; critics all are ready-made.

--_Byron_.

Damn with faint praise, assent with evil leer,
And, without sneering, teach the rest to sneer:
Willing to wound, and yet afraid to strike,
Just hint a fault, and hesitate dislike.

--_Pope_.

THE ARTIST--"Dubbins, the art critic, has slated my pictures
unmercifully."

HIS FRIEND--"Oh, don't take any notice of that fellow; he has no
ideas of his own--he only repeats like a parrot what everybody else is
saying."

CULTURE

JIGGS--"Townsen can read three languages."

TRIGGS--"What are they?"

JIGGS--"Magazines, sporting pages and railroad time-tables."

HE--"Not quite a lady, is she?"

SHE--"No--but I should say her pearls are 'cultured,'"

That is true cultivation which gives us sympathy with every form
of human life, and enables us to work most successfully for its
advancement.--_Beecher_.

CURES

_A Testimonial_

DOCTOR--"Did that cure for deafness really help your brother?"

PAT--"Sure enough; he hadn't heard a sound for years and the day after
he took that medicine, he heard from a friend in America."

CURIOSITY

"My wife is mourning the loss of a ten-thousand-dollar diamond
necklace."

"Why don't you advertise a thousand reward and no questions asked?"

"Well, I could make good on the thousand, but I doubt my wife's
ability to fulfill the rest of that contract."

William E. Weber of the First National Bank says a woman came up to
his window the other day with a cashier's check for fifty dollars.

"What denomination," asked Mr. Weber in his pleasantest manner.

"Lutheran," replied the woman. "What are you?"

CURRENT EVENTS

MRS. BARR--"Henry, what are current events?"

MR. BARR--"Anything shocking, my dear"--_Life_.

CUSTOM

Foote, the comedian, dined one day at a country inn, and the landlord
asked how he liked his fare.

"I have dined as well as any