nowing you were in want of that money, I knew you
would not fail. _First of April, my dear, first of April, you know!_"

Dobbs caved in; he acknowledged the corn, and Mr. and Mrs. Dobbs enjoyed
a pleasant supper.

THE REGRET.

JOSEPH II. Emperor of Germany, traveling incognito, stopped at an inn in
the Netherlands, where, it being fair time, and the house crowded, he
readily slept in an outhouse, after a slender supper of bacon and eggs,
for which, and bed, he paid the charge of about three shillings and
sixpence, English. A few hours after, some of his majesty's suite coming
up, the landlord appeared very uneasy at not having known the rank of
his guest. "Pshaw! man," said one of the attendants, "Joseph is
accustomed to such adventures, and will think nothing of it." "Very
likely," replied mine host, "but I shall. I can never forgive myself for
having an emperor in my house, and letting him off for three and
sixpence."

NOT TO BE TWICE DECEIVED.

A PERSON, more ready to borrow than to pay, prevailed on a friend to
lend him a guinea, on a solemn promise of returning it the ensuing week,
which, to the surprise of the lender, he punctually kept. Shortly after,
he made an application for a larger sum. "No," said the other, "you have
deceived me once, and I will take care you shall not do so a second
time."

MURDER AND SUICIDE.

A CLERGYMAN preaching against lending money on usury, asserted it to be
as great a sin as _murder_. Some time after, he applied to a parishioner
to lend him twenty pounds. "What!" said the other, "after declaring your
opinion that to lend money on usury, was as bad as _murder_?" "I do not
mean," answered the parson, "that you should lend it to me on usury, but
_gratis_." "That," replied the parishioner, "would, in my opinion, be as
bad as _suicide_."

A CHALLENGE.

A SON of Galen, when a company was making merry by ridicule on
physicians, exclaimed, "I defy any person I ever attended, to accuse me
of ignorance or neglect." "That you may do, doctor, _dead men tell no
tales_."

A QUALIFICATION.

A YOUNG nobleman, lately admitted a member of the Board of Agriculture,
observed, as he took his seat, that he himself was an extensive farmer.
The company knowing his lordship's pursuits to be very different, stared
a little at the declaration; but he explained it, by saying, he had
sowed a great deal of _wild oats_.

QUICK WORK.

MRS. PARTING