had first composed
against me; but I had taken such pains to suppress it, that I thought it
would never get into circulation. How it has leaked out I cannot think.
But since the occasion never arose for my having a word of dispute with
him, and since it appears to me to be more carelessly written than my
other speeches, I think it might be maintained not to be by me. Pray
look after this if you think I can do anything to remedy the mischief;
but if my ruin is inevitable, I don't so much care about it. I am still
lying idle in the same place, without conversation, without being able
to think. Though, as you say, I have "intimated" to you my desire that
you should come to me, yet it is now clear to me[328] that you are doing
me useful service where you are, but could not give me even a word of
relief here. I cannot write any more, nor have I anything to say: I am
rather waiting to hear from you all.

Thessalonica, 17 July.

[Footnote 326: Clodius was not re-elected, and Q. Caecilius Metellus
Nepos, who had as tribune (B.C. 63-62) been hostile to Cicero, now as
consul supported Pompey in befriending Cicero.]

[Footnote 327: The speech in the senate _in Curionem et Clodium_,
_i.e._, against the elder C. Curio, who had been Clodius's advocate in
B.C. 61 on the charge _de incesto_. Fragments only of it are preserved.
They are sufficiently violent. Cicero suggests repudiating the
authorship, because the speech had never been delivered, and therefore
was not necessarily intended for publication. There is no special reason
for abusing Cicero's character on this account. If some enemy had got
hold of the MS. and published it without his consent, it was not really
the expression of his deliberate sentiments.]

[Footnote 328: Reading _nunc tamen intellego_ for _si donatam ut
intellego_, which is meaningless. There may be latent in _si donatam_
some proper name, as _Dodonam_ or _Macedoniam_, but it is not possible
to extract it now. _Istic_, as usual, means "where you are," _i.e._, at
Rome.]

LXIX (A III, 14)

TO ATTICUS (AT ROME)

THESSALONICA, 21 JULY

[Sidenote: B.C. 58, AET. 48]

From your letter I am full of anxiety to hear what Pompey's view is of
my case, or what he professes to be his view. The elections, I presume,
are over; and when they were over you say that he was of opinion that my
case should be mooted. If I seem foolish to you for entertaining hopes,
it is at your bidding that I do so: yet I know