lief; and that you give no
sign of fatigue in mind or body from your labours. Ah me! To think that
a woman of your virtue, fidelity, uprightness, and kindness should have
fallen into such troubles on my account! And that my little Tullia
should reap such a harvest of sorrow from the father, from whom she used
to receive such abundant joys! For why mention my boy Cicero, who from
the first moment of conscious feeling has been made aware of the
bitterest sorrows and miseries? And if, as you say, I had thought these
things the work of destiny, I could have borne them somewhat more
easily, but they were really all brought about by my own fault, in
thinking myself beloved by those who were really jealous of me, and in
not joining those who really wanted me.[356] But if I had followed my
own judgment, and had not allowed the observations of friends, who were
either foolish or treacherous, to have such great influence with me, we
should have been living at the height of bliss. As it is, since friends
bid us hope, I will do my best to prevent my weakness of health from
failing to second your efforts. I fully understand the magnitude of the
difficulty, and how much easier it will turn out to have been to stay at
home than to get back. However, if we have all the tribunes on our side,
if we find Lentulus as zealous as he appears to be, if, finally, we have
Pompey and Caesar, there is no reason to despair. About our slaves,[357]
we will do what you say is the opinion of our friends. As to this place,
by this time the epidemic has taken its departure; but while it lasted,
it did not touch me. Plancius, the kindest of men, desires me to stay
with him and still keeps me from departing. I wanted to be in a less
frequented district in Epirus, to which neither Hispo[358] nor soldiers
would come, but as yet Plancius keeps me from going; he hopes that he
may possibly quit his province for Italy in my company. And if ever I
see that day, and come once more into your arms, and if I ever recover
you all and myself, I shall consider that I have reaped a sufficient
harvest both of your piety and my own. Piso's[359] kindness, virtue, and
affection toward us all are so great that nothing can surpass them. I
hope his conduct may be a source of pleasure to him, a source of glory I
see clearly that it will be. I did not mean to find fault with you about
my brother Quintus, but I wished that you all, especially considering
how few there are of you, sh