at our
church, and Pa said corse it is, and he went right in where she was and
said "pretty good show, isn't it," and put out his hand to shake hands
with her, but the woman who tends the stand came along and thought Pa
was drunk and said "old gentleman I guess you had better get out of
here. This is for ladies only."

"Pa said he didn't care nothing about her lady's only, all he wanted was
to converse with an acquaintance, and then one of the policemen came
along and told Pa he had better go down to the saloon where he belonged.
Pa excused himself to the wax woman, and said he would see her later,
and told the policeman if he would come out on the sidewalk he would
knock leven kinds of stuffin out of him. The policeman told him that
would be all right, and I led Pa away. He was offul mad. But it was the
best fun when the lights went out. You see the electric light machine
slipped a cog, or lost its cud, and all of a sudden the lights went out
and it was as dark as a squaw's pocket. Pa wanted to know what made it
so dark, and I told him it was not dark. He said boy don't you fool
me. You see I thought it would be fun to make Pa believe he was struck
blind, so I told him his eyes must be wrong. He said do you mean to
say you can see, and I told him everything was as plain as day, and
I pointed out the different things, and explained them, and walked Pa
along, and acted just as though I could see, and Pa said it had come
at last. He had felt for years as though he would some day lose
his eyesight and now it had come and he said he laid it all to that
condamned mineral water. After a little they lit some of the gas
burners, and Pa said he could see a little, and wanted to go home, and
I took him home. When we got out of the building he began to see things,
and said his eyes were coming around all right. Pa is the easiest man to
fool ever I saw."

"Well, I should think he would kill you," said the grocery man. "Don't
he ever catch on, and find out you have deceived him?"

"O, sometimes. But about nine times in ten I can get away with him. Say,
don't you want to hire me for a clerk?"

The grocery man said that he had rather have a spotted hyena, and the
boy stole a melon and went away.

CHAPTER XIV.

HIS PA CATCHES OK--TWO DAYS AND NIGHTS IN THE BATH ROOM--
RELIGION CAKES THE OLD MAN'S BREAST--THE BAD BOY'S CHUM--
DRESSED UP AS A GIRL--THE OLD MAN DELUDED--THE COUPLE START
FOR THE COURT HOUS