aid, "howly Jaysus," and went
out in the kitchen, as pale as Ma is when she has powder on her face,
and the other girl who is Dutch, she swallowed a pancake and said, "Mine
Gott, vas de matter from me," and she went out and leaned on the coal
bin, then they talked Irish and Dutch, and got clubs, and started to
look for me, and I thought I would come over here.

"The whole family is sick, but it is not from love, like my illness, and
they will get over it, while I shall fill an early grave, but not till I
have made that girl and the telegraph messenger wish they were dead. Pa
and I are going to Chicago next week, and I'll bet we'll have some fun.
Pa says I need a change of air, and I think he is going to try and lose
me. It's a cold day when I get left anywhere that I can't find my way
back, Well, good bye, old rotten potatoes."

CHAPTEE XXI.

HE AND HIS PA IN CHICAGO--NOTHING LIKE TRAVELING TO GIVE
TONE--LAUGHING IN THE WRONG PLACE--A DIABOLICAL PLOT--HIS PA
ARRESTED AS A KIDNAPPER--THE NUMBERS ON THE DOORS CHANGED--
THE WRONG ROOM--"NOTHIN THE MAZZER WITH ME, PET!"--THE TELL-
TALE HAT.

"What is this I hear about your Pa's being arrested in Chicago," said
the grocery man to the bad boy, as he came in with a can for kerosene
and a jug for vinegar.

"Well, it was true, but the police let him go after they hit him a few
licks and took him to the station," said the boy, as he got the vinegar
into the kerosene can, and the kerosene in the jug. "You see, Pa and me
went down there to stay over night, and have fun. Ma said she druther we
would be away then not when they were cleaning house, and Pa thought it
would do me good to travel, and sort of get tone, and he thought maybe
I'd be better, and not play jokes, but I guess it is born in me. Do you
know I actually think of mean things to do when I am in the most solemn
places. They took me to a funeral once; and I got to thinking what a
stampede there would be if the corpse would come to life and sit up
in the coffin, and I snickered right out, and Pa took me out doors
and kicked my pants. I don't think he orter kicked me for it, cause I
didn't think of it a purpose. Such things have occurred, and I have read
about them, and a poor boy ought to be allowed to think, hadn't he?"

"Yes, but what about his being arrested. Never mind the funeral," said
the grocery man, as he took his knife and picked some of the lead out of
the weights on the s