coat collar pulled up over his head, and have the set of his
coat spoiled, and he was going to sass the man, when I told Pa the man
was a lunatic from the asylum, that was on exhibition, and Pa wanted to
go away from there. He said he didn't know what they wanted to exhibit
lunatics for. We went up stairs to the pancake bazar, where they broil
pancakes out of self rising flour, and put butter and sugar on them and
give them away. Pa said he could eat more pancakes than any man out of
jail, and wanted me to get him some. I took a couple of pancakes
and tore out a piece of the lining of my coat and put it between the
pancakes and handed them to Pa, with a paper around the pancakes. Pa
didn't notice the paper nor the cloth, and it would have made you laff
to see him chew on them. I told him I guessed he didn't have as good
teeth as he used to, and he said never you mind the teeth, and he kept
on until he swallowed the whole business, and he said he guessed he
didn't want any more. He is so sensitive about his teeth that he would
eat a leather apron if anybody told him he couldn't. When the doctor
said Pa's digestion was bad, I told him if he could let Pa swallow a
seamstress or a sewing machine, to sew up the cloth, he would get well,
and the Doc. says I am going to be the death of Pa some day. But I
thought I should split when Pa wanted a drink of water. I asked him if
he would druther have mineral water, and he said he guessed it would
take the strongest kind of mineral water to wash down them pancakes, so
I took him to where the fire extinguishers are, and got him to take
the nozzle of the extinguisher in his mouth, and I turned the faucet. I
don't think he got more than a quart of the stuff out of the saleratus
machine down him, but he rared right up and said he be condamed if
believed that water was ever intended to drink, and he felt as though he
should bust, and just then the man who kicks the big organ struck up and
the building shook, and I guess Pa thought he _had_ busted. The most fun
was when we came along to where the wax woman is. They have got a wax
woman dressed up to kill, and she looks just as natural as if she could
breathe. She had a handkerchief in her hand, and as we came along I told
Pa there was a lady that seemed to know him. Pa is on the mash himself,
and he looked at her and smiled and said good evening, and asked me who
she was.

"I told him it looked to me like the girl that sings in the choir