,' says I.

"'Well,' he says, th' dear man, 'ye may. On'y,' he says, ''tis Lent.'

"'Yes,' says I.

"'Well, thin,' he says, 'by ye'er lave I'll take but half a lump iv
sugar in mine,' he says."

THE QUICK AND THE DEAD.

Mr. Dooley and Mr. McKenna sat outside the ample door of the little
liquor store, the evening being hot, and wrapped their legs around the
chair, and their lips around two especially long and soothing drinks.
They talked politics and religion, the people up and down the street,
the chances of Murphy, the tinsmith, getting on the force, and a great
deal about the weather. A woman in white started Mr. McKenna's nerves.

"Glory be, I thought it was a ghost!" said Mr. McKenna, whereupon the
conversation drifted to those interesting phenomena. Mr. Dooley asked
Mr. McKenna if he had ever seen one. Mr. McKenna replied that he
hadn't, and didn't want to. Had Mr. Dooley? "No," said the
philosopher, "I niver did; an' it's always been more thin sthrange to
me that annywan shud come back afther he'd been stuck in a crate five
feet deep, with a ton iv mud upon him. 'Tis onplisint iv thim,
annyhow, not to say ongrateful. F'r mesilf, if I was wanst pushed off,
an' they'd waked me kindly, an' had a solemn rayqueem high mass f'r
me, an' a funeral with Roddey's Hi-beryan band, an' th' A-ho-aitches,
I have too much pride to come back f'r an encore. I wud so, Jawn. Whin
a man's dead, he ought to make th' best iv a bad job, an' not be
thrapsin' around, lookin' f'r throuble among his own kind.

"No, I niver see wan, but I know there are such things; f'r twinty
years ago all th' road was talkin' about how Flaherty, th' tailor,
laid out th' ghost iv Tim O'Grady. O'Grady was a big sthrappin'
Connock man, as wide across th' shoulders as a freight car. He was a
plastherer be thrade whin wages was high, an' O'Grady was rowlin' in
wealth. Ivry Sundah ye'd see him, with his horse an' buggy an' his
goold watch an' chain, in front iv th' Sullivans' house, waitin' f'r
Mary Ann Sullivan to go f'r a buggy ride with him over to McAllister
Place; an' he fin'lly married her, again th' wishes iv Flaherty, who
took to histin' in dhrinks, an' missed his jooty, an' was a scandal in
th' parish f'r six months.

"O'Grady didn't improve with mathrimony, but got to lanin' again th'
ol' stuff, an' walkin' up an' down th' sidewalk in his shirt-sleeves,
with his thumbs stuck in his vest, an' his little pipe turned upside
down; an', whi