appearances?' [Groans.]

"'Gin'ral Billot,' says th' prisident, 'what d'ye know about this
infernal case which is broodin' like a nightmare over our belovid
counthry, an' gettin' us up ivry mornin' befure milkin' time?'

"'Nawthin' at all,' says Gin'ral Billot.

"'Nayther do I,' says th' prisident. 'But I think th' Cap's guilty.'

"'I'm glad to hear ye say that,' says th' gin'ral, 'If ye didn't, I'd
rayjooce ye to th' r-ranks to-morrah. I niver see th' man befure; an',
be hivins, I don't want to see him again. But I have a letter here
fr'm him, askin' me if he cud knock off wurruk at four o'clock to go
to his aunt's fun'ral.'

"'Cap,' says th' prisident, 'what ye got to say to this? Did ye write
th' letter?'

"'I did,' says th' Cap.

"'Throw it out thin,' says th' prisident. 'We must be guided be th'
laws iv ividence. Th' witness will confine himself to forgeries. Have
ye e'er a forgery about ye'er clothes, mon gin'ral?'

"'I wish to confront th' witness,' says Matther Blamange.

"'Sit down,'" says th' prisident.

"'D'ye raymimber meetin' me at dinner at Moosoo de Bozoo's. It was
years ago, durin' th' time iv Napolyeon, befure th' big fire? If I
raymimber right, we had peas. Wasn't it a lovely night? Oh dear, oh
dear, gintlemen iv th' press an' mon prisident, ye ought to have been
there. Well, I says to Gin'ral Billot, I says, "Gin'ral," I says, "how
ar-re ye, annyhow." An' the gin'ral replies, "F'r an ol' man, well." I
made up me mind thin that th' Cap was innocent, an' this was before he
was born.

"'Me distinguished colleague in th' thrile iv this case, th' editor iv
wan iv th' Paris papers,' says th' prisident, 'has received a letter
fr'm th' military attachay or spy iv th' Impror iv Austhrich, sayin'
that he did not write th' letter referred to be Prisident Kruger, an',
if he did, it's a forgery. But what cud ye ixpict? I will throw both
letters into the secret dossier.'

"'What's that?' says Matther Blamange.

"'It's a collection iv pomes wrote to th' Paris papers be spies,' says
th' prisident. 'Call Colonel Peekhart, if th' others ar-re not
through. What, you again, Peekhart? Set down, sir.'

"'Gintlemen iv Fr-rance,' says Colonel Peekhart. 'Unaccustomed as I am
to public speakin', I wish to addhress ye a few wurruds on th'
situation iv th' poor in China.'

"'Assassin!' hisses th' coort.

"'Canal!' says Matther Blamange.

"At this moment th' door was burst open; an' an ex-Prisident iv
Fr-ra