only have all these lovers; and he that so marries, or for
such respects, let them look for no better success than Menelaus had with
Helen, Vulcan with Venus, Theseus with Phaedra, Minos with Pasiphae, and
Claudius with Messalina; shame, sorrow, misery, melancholy, discontent.

SUBSECT. IV.--_Importunity and Opportunity of Time, Place, Conference,
Discourse, Singing, Dancing, Music, Amorous Tales, Objects, Kissing,
Familiarity, Tokens, Presents, Bribes, Promises, Protestations, Tears, &c._

All these allurements hitherto are afar off, and at a distance; I will come
nearer to those other degrees of love, which are conference, kissing,
dalliance, discourse, singing, dancing, amorous tales, objects, presents,
&c., which as so many sirens steal away the hearts of men and women. For,
as Tacitus observes, _l. 2_, [5054]"It is no sufficient trial of a maid's
affection by her eyes alone, but you must say something that shall be more
available, and use such other forcible engines; therefore take her by the
hand, wring her fingers hard, and sigh withal; if she accept this in good
part, and seem not to be much averse, then call her mistress, take her
about the neck and kiss her," &c. But this cannot be done except they first
get opportunity of living, or coming together, ingress, egress, and
regress; letters and commendations may do much, outward gestures and
actions: but when they come to live near one another, in the same street,
village, or together in a house, love is kindled on a sudden. Many a
serving-man by reason of this opportunity and importunity inveigles his
master's daughter, many a gallant loves a dowdy, many a gentleman runs upon
his wife's maids; many ladies dote upon their men, as the queen in Ariosto
did upon the dwarf, many matches are so made in haste, and they are
compelled as it were by [5055]necessity so to love, which had they been
free, come in company of others, seen that variety which many places
afford, or compared them to a third, would never have looked one upon
another. Or had not that opportunity of discourse and familiarity been
offered, they would have loathed and contemned those whom, for want of
better choice and other objects, they are fatally driven on, and by reason
of their hot blood, idle life, full diet, &c., are forced to dote upon them
that come next. And many times those which at the first sight cannot fancy
or affect each other, but are harsh and ready to disagree, offended with
each