ishop of W----,
did: "Oh," replied his lordship, "if I was as _deaf_ as my brother, I
would subscribe too."

CMLXXXII.--LINGUAL INFECTION.

A FASHIONABLE Irish gentleman, driving a good deal about Cheltenham, was
observed to have the not very graceful habit of lolling his tongue out
as he went along. Curran, who was there, was asked what he thought could
be his countryman's motive for giving the instrument of eloquence such
an airing. "Oh!" said he, "he's trying _to catch_ the English accent."

CMLXXXIII.--PORSON _versus_ DR. JOWETT.

DR. JOWETT, who was a _small_ man, was permitted by the head of his
college to cultivate a strip of vacant ground. This gave rise to some
_jeux d'esprit_ among the wags of the University, which induced him to
alter it into a plot of gravel, and Porson burst forth with the
following extemporaneous lines:--

A _little_ garden _little_ Jowett made,
And fenced it with a _little_ palisade;
Because this garden made a _little_ talk,
He changed it to a _little_ gravel walk;
And now, if more you'd know of _little_ Jowett,
A _little_ time, it will a _little_ show it.

CMLXXXIV.--BREVITY OF CHARITY.

BREVITY is in writing what charity is to all other virtues.
Righteousness is worth nothing without the one, nor authorship without
the other.

CMLXXXV.--HIGH GAMING.

BARON N., once playing at cards, was guilty of an _odd trick_; on which
his opponent threw him out of the window of a one-pair-of-stairs room.
The baron meeting Foote complained of this usage, and asked what he
should do? "Do," says the wit, "never play _so high_ again as long as
you live."

CMLXXXVI.--HARD OF DIGESTION.

QUIN had been dining, and his host expressed his regret that he could
offer no more wine, as he had lost the key of his wine-cellar. While the
coffee was getting ready the host showed his guest some natural
curiosities, and among the rest an ostrich. "Do you know, sir, that this
bird has one very remarkable property--he will swallow iron?"--"Then
very likely," said Quin, "he has swallowed the _key_ of your
_wine-cellar_!"

CMLXXXVII.--A MONSTER.

SYDNEY SMITH said that "the Court of Chancery was like a
boa-constrictor, which swallowed up the estates of English gentlemen in
haste, and digested them at leisure."

CMLXXXVIII.--SAILOR'S WEDDING.

A JACK-TAR just returned from sea, determined to commit matrimony,