I had no more conception of the beauties of scripture than a mule, and
then I told Pa he couldn't expect a mule to know much unless the mule's
father had brought him up right, and where a mule's father had been a
regular old bummer till he got jim-jams, and only got religon to keep
out of the inebriate asylum, that the little mule was entitled to more
charity for his short comings than the mule's Papa. That seemed to make
Pa mad, and he said the scripture lesson would be continued some other
time, and I might go out and play, and if I wasn't in before nine
o'clock he would come after me and warm my jacket. Well, I was out
playing, and me and my chum heard of the murder in the Third Ward,
and went down there to see the dead and wounded, and it was after ten
o'clock, and Pa was searching for me, and I saw Pa go into an alley,
in his shirt sleves and no hat on, and the police were looking for the
murderer, and I told the policeman that there was a suspicious looking
man in the alley, and the policeman went in there and jumped on his
back, and held him down, and the patrol wagon came, and they loaded Pa
in, and he gnashed his teeth, and said they would pay dearly for this,
and they held his hands and told him not to talk, as he would commit
himself, and they tore off his suspender buttons, and I went home and
told Ma the police had pulled Pa for being in a suspicious place, and
she said she had always been afraid he would come to some bad end, and
we went down to the station and the police let Pa go on promise that he
wouldn't do so again, and we went home and Pa fanned the dust out of
my pants. But he did it in a pious manner, and I can't complain. He was
trying to explain to Ma how it was that he was pulled, when I came away,
and I guess he will make out to square himself. Say, don't these peaches
seem to have a darn queer taste. Well, good bye. I am going down to the
morgue to have some fun."

CHAPTER XIII.

HIS PA GOES TO THE EXPOSITION. THE BAD BOY ACTS AS GUIDE--
THE CIRCUS STORY--THE OLD MAN WANTS TO SIT DOWN--TRIES TO
EAT PANCAKES--DRINKS SOME MINERAL WATER--THE OLD MAN FALLS
IN LOVE WITH A WAX WOMAN--A POLICEMAN INTERFERES--THE LIGHTS
GO OUT--THE GROCERY-MAN DON'T WANT A CLERK.

"Well, everything seems to be quiet over to your house this week," says
the groceryman to the bad boy, as the youth was putting his thumb into
some peaches through the mosquito netting over the baskets, to s