n these metallic
problems have their melodramatic side.

[Goes down the garden with Dr. Chasuble.]

Cecily. [Picks up books and throws them back on table.] Horrid
Political Economy! Horrid Geography! Horrid, horrid German!

[Enter Merriman with a card on a salver.]

Merriman. Mr. Ernest Worthing has just driven over from the station. He
has brought his luggage with him.

Cecily. [Takes the card and reads it.] 'Mr. Ernest Worthing, B. 4, The
Albany, W.' Uncle Jack's brother! Did you tell him Mr. Worthing was in
town?

Merriman. Yes, Miss. He seemed very much disappointed. I mentioned
that you and Miss Prism were in the garden. He said he was anxious to
speak to you privately for a moment.

Cecily. Ask Mr. Ernest Worthing to come here. I suppose you had better
talk to the housekeeper about a room for him.

Merriman. Yes, Miss.

[Merriman goes off.]

Cecily. I have never met any really wicked person before. I feel rather
frightened. I am so afraid he will look just like every one else.

[Enter Algernon, very gay and debonnair.] He does!

Algernon. [Raising his hat.] You are my little cousin Cecily, I'm sure.

Cecily. You are under some strange mistake. I am not little. In fact,
I believe I am more than usually tall for my age. [Algernon is rather
taken aback.] But I am your cousin Cecily. You, I see from your card,
are Uncle Jack's brother, my cousin Ernest, my wicked cousin Ernest.

Algernon. Oh! I am not really wicked at all, cousin Cecily. You mustn't
think that I am wicked.

Cecily. If you are not, then you have certainly been deceiving us all in
a very inexcusable manner. I hope you have not been leading a double
life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That
would be hypocrisy.

Algernon. [Looks at her in amazement.] Oh! Of course I have been
rather reckless.

Cecily. I am glad to hear it.

Algernon. In fact, now you mention the subject, I have been very bad in
my own small way.

Cecily. I don't think you should be so proud of that, though I am sure
it must have been very pleasant.

Algernon. It is much pleasanter being here with you.

Cecily. I can't understand how you are here at all. Uncle Jack won't be
back till Monday afternoon.

Algernon. That is a great disappointment. I am obliged to go up by the
first train on Monday morning. I have a business appointment that I am
anxious . . . to miss?

Cecily. Couldn't yo