ineral rebellyon against
th' white man.

"It's no laughin' matther, I tell ye. A subjick race is on'y funny whin
it's raaly subjick. About three years ago I stopped laughin' at
Jap'nese jokes. Ye have to feel supeeryor to laugh an' I'm gettin' over
that feelin'. An' nawthin' makes a man so mad an' so scared as whin
something he looked down on as infeeryor tur-rns on him. If a fellow man
hits him he hits him back. But if a dog bites him he yells 'mad dog' an'
him an' th' neighbors pound th' dog to pieces with clubs. If th' naygurs
down South iver got together an' flew at their masters ye'd hear no more
coon songs f'r awhile. It's our conceit makes us supeeryor. Take it out
iv us an' we ar-re about th' same as th' rest."

"I wondher what we'd do if all thim infeeryor races shud come at us
together?" said Mr. Hennessy. "They're enough iv thim to swamp us."

"Well," said Mr. Dooley, "I'd have to go on bein' white or, to speak
more acc'rately, pink. An' annyhow I guess they've been infeeryor too
long to change. It's got to be a habit with thim."

PANICS

"Have ye taken ye'er money out iv th' bank? Are ye wan iv thim impechuse
prooletaryans that has been attackin' th' Gibyraltars iv fi-nance,
cow'rd that ye are to want ye'er money in a hurry, or are ye not? I see
be th' look iv ye'er face that ye are not. Ye have been a brave man; ye
have had faith in th' future iv our counthry; ye have perceived that our
financial institutions are sound if they are nawthin' else. Ye
undherstand that it's upon th' self-resthraint iv men like th' likes iv
ye that th' whole credit iv th' nation depinds. I read it in the
pa-apers an' 'tis thrue. Besides, ye have no money in th' bank. Th' on'y
way ye or me cud rightly exthricate anny money fr'm a bank wud be be
means iv a brace an' bit.

"No matther. 'Tis you that has done it. I give great credit to George B.
Cortilyoo, J. Pierpont Morgan, Lord Rothschild, Jawn D. Rockyfellar,
th' banks iv Ameriky, th' clearing house comity, th' clearing out
comity, an' all th' brave an' gallant fellows that have stood firmly
with their backs to th' wall an' declared that anny money taken out iv
their institutions wud be taken over their dead bodies. They have
behaved as American gintlemen shud behave whin foorce iv circumstances
compels thim to behave that way. But if, in this tur-rible imergency I
am obliged to tell th' truth, I've got to confess to ye that th' thanks
iv th' nation, a little bit