f. That would be the greatest service it could do him."

* * *

Newman, by the way, is a piano-player fan, contending that when the
principles of beautiful tone production are understood, mechanical means
will probably come nearer to perfection than the human hand. Mr. Arthur
Whiting, considering the horseless pianoforte some time ago, was also
enthusiastic. The h. p. is entirely self-possessed, and has even more
platform imperturbability than the applauded virtuoso. "After a few
introductory sounds, which have nothing to do with the music, and
without relaxing the lines of its inscrutable face, the insensate artist
proceeds to show its power. Its security puts all hand playing to shame;
it never hesitates, it surmounts the highest difficulties without
changing a clutch."

* * *

Dixon's Elks were entertained t'other evening by the Artists Trio, and
the Telegraph observes that "one of the remarkable facts concerning
this company is that while they are finished artists they nevertheless
are delightful entertainers."

* * *

We seldom listen to a canned-music machine, but when we do we realize
the great educational value of the discs. They advise us (especially the
records of singing comedians) what to avoid.

* * *

The prejudices against German music will deprive many gluttons for
punishment of the opportunity to hear "Parsifal." We remember one lady
who was concerned because Dalmores stood for a long time with his back
to the audience. "Why does he have to do that?" she asked her companion.
"Because," was the answer, "he shot the Holy Grail."

* * *

At a concert in Elmira, N. Y., according to the Telegram, William
Kincade sang "Tolstoi's Good Bye." Some one sings it every now and then.

* * *

Among the forty-six professors removed from the universities of Greece
were, we understand, all those holding the chair of Greek. Another blow
at the classics.

* * *

LITERATURE.

A great deal of very good writing has been done by invalids, but it is
not likely that anybody ever produced a line worth remembering while
suffering with a plain cold.

* * *

We were saying to our friend Dr. Empedocles that we kept our enthusiasms
green by never taking anything very seriously. "That's interesting,"
said he: "I, too, have kept my enthusiasm fresh, and I have alw