desired;
We've no excuse except to say
We were not built the German way.

But why these wails and tears and whines?
I must assume that they are bluff,
That, as compared with your designs,
You find our terms are easy stuff,
And, with your tongue against your cheek,
You'll sign the lot within a week.

O.S.

* * * * *

THE BEETLE OF BUDA-PESTH.

AN UNRECORDED EPISODE OF THE GREAT WAR.

The War being now practically at an end and Austria-Hungary
irrevocably broken up, I am able to recount an adventure, in which
I was involved, that occurred at Buda-Pesth in the second week of
August, 1914.

Seated at a cafe on the famous Franz-Josef Quai, I was sipping coffee,
after an excellent lunch, with Frederick, whose surname I will not
mention in case I get into trouble for relating the incident before
Peace is actually signed. The sun shone joyously down upon the
kaleidoscope of gaily dressed people promenading by the cool waters
of the Danube, and we sat engrossed--I in the charm of the scene, and
Frederick in that of individual beauties who passed to and fro.

Suddenly I noticed that he was staring intently upon the ground a few
yards in front of him. I asked him what was the matter.

"Perceive," he replied in a very serious tone, "a small beetle of the
order of Coleoptera making its way across the pavement?"

"I do perceive it," I replied; "but what about it?"

"Does it not occur to you," he continued, "that it is a very
remarkable thing that that beetle should have already travelled six
feet across the most crowded promenade in Buda-Pesth without having
been trodden on?"

Being used to Frederick I do not take him too seriously and made no
reply, intending to brush the incident aside, but I found my gaze
continually returning to Coleopteron, conscious of that peculiar
fascination which attracts one to impending tragedy. It was evident
that he had just left the cafe and was hurrying across the promenade
to catch the little steamer which was due to leave in ten minutes for
Ofen. It was also evident to any thinking individual that there must
be some extraordinarily urgent reason for his wishing to catch the
boat which justified him in taking the awful risks which he was
incurring. The position was full of human interest and I became as
intrigued as Frederick.

It seemed that Coleopteron was under some divine protection which
enabled him to elude so large a cr