r Baked Apple she saw
nothing in this wide World except Kenneth, still reeking of Witch
Hazel and spotted with Talcum Powder, and not very long on Sparkling
Conversation.

When he was propped up in the cold Dawn, with his eyes partially open,
he did not resemble a Royal Personage nearly as much as he had in some
of his earlier Photographs.

Father would order soft-boiled Eggs to be Eaten from the Shell. When
Kenneth got around to these, he would cease to be a Romantic Figure
for at least a few Minutes. Bernice would turn away in dread and look
out at the swaying Trees and long to see some of her Girl Friends back
home.

After Kenneth had been served to her, three meals a day, for two Weeks
and they had ridden together for Ages and Ages, in Pullman
Compartments, she made certain horrible Discoveries.

One of his Ears was larger than the other.

He made a funny noise with his Adam's Apple when drinking Hot Coffee.

When he was annoyed, he bit his nails.

When suffering from a Cold, he was Sniffy.

The first time she became aware of the slight discrepancy in Ears, she
suffered only a slight Annoyance. It handed her a tiny Pang to find a
Flaw in a Piece of Work that she had regarded as Perfect.

After she had seen nothing else but those Ears for many, many Days, it
became evident to her that if Kenneth truly loved her, he would go and
have them fixed.

Likewise, every time her Heart's Delight lifted the Cup to his Ruby
Lips, she would grip the Table Cloth with both Hands, and whisper to
herself, "Now we get the Funny Noise."

Kenneth, in the mean while, had found out that her Hair did not always
look the same, but one who is striving to get a Meal Ticket for Life
cannot be over-fastidious.

He was Game and stood ready to obey all Orders in order to pull down
the Capital Prize.

He had been such a Hit in the Maple-Sundae Set that he could not
conceive the possibility of any Female becoming satiated with his
Society.

The poor Loon never stopped to figure out that the only way to keep a
Girl sitting up and interested is to stay away once in a while and
give her a Vacation.

Father was right on the Job to see that Bernice had no Vacation. He
framed it up to give her a Foretaste of Matrimony every Day in the
Week.

If the Future Husband wandered more than thirty feet from her side,
Father would nail him and Sic him on to her again.

She would look up and say: "Oh, Fury! Look who's here again!"

This wa