one needn't come and hear you; now one can't keep out of
your way.

FOR SHOW SUNDAY.

"_Shall you have many Pictures in this year?_" _i.e._, He'll jump for
joy if he gets one in.

"_Is your big Picture going to Burlington House or the Grosvenor?_"
_i.e._, They wouldn't have it at an East-End Free Art Show.

"_By Jove, dear boy, Burne-Jones will have to look to his laurels?_"
_i.e._, Green mist and gawky girls, as usual!

"_What I love about your pictures, dear Mr. Stodge, is their Subtle
Ideal treatment, so different, &c., &c.?_" _i.e._, 'Tisn't like anything
on earth.

"_Best thing you've done for years, my boy; and, mark my words, it'll
create a sensation!_" _i.e._, Everybody says it'll be a great go, and I
may as well be in it.

"_Entre nous, I don't think Millais' landscape is to be compared with
it?_" _i.e._, I should hope not--for MILLAIS' sake.

"_Fancy hanging him on the line, and skying you! It's too bad?_" _i.e._,
His picture is.

"_Glad you haven't gone in for mere 'pretty, pretty,' this time, old
man_;" _i.e._, It's ugly enough for a scarecrow.

"_My dear Sir, it's as mournfully impressive as a Millet_;" _i.e._, Dull
skies and dowdy peasants!

"_Well, it's something in these days to see a picture one can get a
laugh out of_;" _i.e._, Or at!

AUCTIONEERING.

"_Every Modern Convenience_;" _i.e._, Electric-bells and disconnected
drain-pipes.

"_Cheap and Commodious Flat_;" _i.e._, Seven small square rooms, with no
outlook, at about the rent of a Hyde Park mansion.

"_A Desirable Residence_;" _i.e._, To get out of.

PLATFORMULARS.

"_And thus bring to a triumphant issue the fight in which we are
engaged_;" _i.e._, Thank Heaven, I managed to get off my peroration all
right.

"_Our great Leader_;" _i.e._, "That's sure to make them cheer, and will
give me time to think."

* * * * *

[Illustration: SOCIAL ECONOMY.

_Mrs. Scrooge._ "I'M WRITING TO ASK THE BROWNS TO MEET THE JONESES HERE
AT DINNER, AND TO THE JONESES TO MEET THE BROWNS. WE OWE THEM BOTH, YOU
KNOW."

_Mr. Scrooge._ "BUT I'VE HEARD THEY'VE JUST QUARRELLED, AND DON'T
SPEAK!"

_Mrs. Scrooge._ "I KNOW. THEY'LL REFUSE, AND WE NEEDN'T GIVE A DINNER
PARTY AT ALL!"]

* * * * *

"MY CURATE."

[The _Law Times_ mentions that a photograph of a well-dressed and
good-looking gentleman has been sent to it, with the words "My
Advocate" beneath. On the back