g, special pleading, or paltry
spite, will, on applying personally to _Mr. Punch_, be HANDSOMELY
REWARDED!!!

* * * * *

PUT THIS IN YOUR PIPE.

[Pipe-Major MCKELLAR has thrown doubts upon the pretty and pathetic
story of "JESSIE BROWN of Lucknow."]

Our faith to the winds you would chuck now,
Concerning that Legend of Lucknow.
That sweet Scottish girl
Never heard the pipes "skirl?"
Come! This is mere sceptical muck now!

The Ross-shire Buffs' slogan I'll wager
Will survive many stories much sager.
Our faith in the tale
Is confirmed, and won't fail
At the word of a single Pipe-Major.

* * * * *

[Illustration: TIME WORKS WONDERS.

(_Mr. Punch's Suggestions, a propos of the recent Discussions about Mr.
Gladstone's Head._)]

* * * * *

MUSICAL NOTES.

I HAVE just received FLORIAN PASCAL'S Music composed for _Tra la la
Tosca_, published by JOSEPH WILLIAMS of Berners Street. Justice was not
done to it on the stage at the Royalty, but there are two _morceaux_ in
it which ought to become popular; one being a song entitled "_Her Eye_,"
which, were it wedded to serious words, would be highly popular as a
contralto song, just as SULLIVAN'S charming "_Hush a bye Bacon_," in
_Cox and Box_, became "_Birds of the Night_." Then the Gavotte in this
book is as graceful and catching as the _Gavotte de Louis Treize_, and
would be in great request with orchestras and bands everywhere.

KLEIN'S _Musical Notes of the Year_, a useful and trustworthy historical
record, was sent to me, and not "de-KLEIN'd with thanks." I have just
heard that there is a new pick-me-up called "Zingit." What it is I don't
know, and I haven't as yet come across the inevitable big advertisement;
but what I have ascertained is, that Mr. EDWARD SOLOMON, who is now
wearing the diamond scarf-pin presented to him by the Guards whom he led
on to victory in their recent burlesque engagement, has composed a polka
or waltz which bears the name of "_Zingit_," and which might bear on the
wrapper, "If you can't play it, or dance it, Zing it."

(_Signed_) OTTO PICCOLO (DU CONSERVATOIRE).

* * * * *

Mr. HUBERT VOS requests the honour of our company at his studio near
Vauxhall Bridge. Very sorry: couldn't get there. "_Sic_ Vos _non
vobis_."

* * * * *

A "S