ts as
told, and had now seen a few pictures of the long slit, I never could
realise that that was only the outside of the cunt, until I had had a
woman. My fingers had no doubt slipped over the surface of hers,
from clitoris to arse-hole; the space my hand covered filled me with
astonishment, as well as the smell it left on my fingers, I thought of
that more than anything else. This seems to me now laughable, but it was
a marvel to me then.

When I sneaked into the kitchen again, I was ashamed to look at her, and
left almost directly, but one day I felt her again, laughing she put her
hand outside my trousers, gave my doodle a gentle pinch and kissed me.
"Let's do it!" I said. "Lor! you ain't man enough," and again I slunk
away ashamed.

CHAPTER IV.

My first frig.--My godfather.--Meditations on copulation.--
Male and female aromas.--Maid and gardener.--My father
dies.--A wet dream.--Bilked by a whore.

The frequency of my cock-stands, up to this time I don't know.
Voluptuous sensation, I have no clear recollection of; but no doubt
during that half swooning delight, which I had when big Betsy allowed me
to lay my head on her lap and feel her limbs, that impulse towards the
woman was accompanied by sensuous pleasure, though I don't recollect the
fact, but soon my manhood was to declare itself.

Some time after I had felt this servant's quim, I noticed a strong
smelling, whitish stuff inside my foreskin, making the underside of the
tip of the prick sore. At first I thought it disease, then pulling the
foreskin up, I made it into a sort of cup, dropped warm water into
it, and working it about, washed all round the nut, and let the randy
smelling infusion escape. This marked my need for a woman, I did not
know what the exudation was, it made me in a funk at first. One day I
had been toying with the girl, had a cockstand, and felt again my prick
sore, and was washing it with warm water, when it swelled up. I rubbed
it through my hand, which gave me unusual pleasure, then a voluptuous
sensation came over me quickly so thrilling and all pervading that I
shall never forget it. I sunk on to a chair, feeling my cock gently, the
next instant spunk jotted out in large drops, a full yard in front of
me, and a thinner liquid rolled over my knuckles. I had frigged myself,
without intending it.

Then came astonishment, mingled with disgust, I examined the viscid
gruelly fluid with the greatest curiosity, sm