king and smarting made me randy: risking all, whilst my mother
was actually in the adjoining room, the poor girl in horrid fear and
looking shockingly ill, I thrust my hand up her clothes and on to her
split. She whispered, "What a wretch you are!" I went to college, came
back at three o'clock, thinking always on the same subject; my prick got
worse, I took it into my head, that Charlotte had given me some disease,
and was in a dreadful state of mind. I washed it with warm water, and
greased it, having eased it thus a little, got the skin down, then could
not get it back again, it got stiff; as it did so sexual pleasures came
into my mind, and worse got the pain. I greased it more, my pain grew
less, I touched the tip with my finger, it gave a throb of pleasure, I
went on without meaning, almost without knowing, the pleasure came and
spunk shot out. I had frigged myself unintentionally again.

I watched my penis shrink, its tension lessen, its high colour go, then
came the feeling of disgust at myself that I have always felt after
frigging, a disgust not quite absent even when done by the little
hands of fair friends, to whose quims I was paying similar delicate
attentions. I was able to pull up the skin again, but the soreness got
worse, I told the poor girl that my prick was very sore, and that I
thought it strange. It did not wound her feelings, for she did not know
my suspicions. The next morning being no better, I with much hesitation
told a college friend, he looked at my prick, and thought it either clap
or pox. Frightened to go to our own doctor, I at his advice went to a
chemist, who did a little business in such matters; we dealt there, but
my friend assured me that the man never opened his mouth to any one, if
youths consulted him, and many he knew had.

With quaking I said to the chemist, that I had something the matter with
my thing. "What?" said he. "I don't know." "Let me see it." I began
to beg him not to mention it to my mother, or anyone. "Don't waste my
time," said he, "show it to me, if you want my advice." Out I pulled it
as small as could be, but still with the skin over it. "Have you been
with a woman?" said he. "Yes." He looked at my shirt, there was no
discharge, then he laid hold of my prick with both hands, and with force
pulled the skin right down, I howled. He told me there was nothing the
matter with me, that the skin was too tight, that a snip would set me to
rights, and advised me soon to