olidays. The girl was agitated with some
undefined idea of what might take place, we kissed and hugged, but she
did not like even that, I saw.

I restrained myself whilst eating, she sat quietly beside me; when I had
finished she began to remove the things, the food gave me courage, her
moving about stimulated me, I began to feel her breasts, then got my
hands on to her thighs, we had the usual struggles, but it seems to me
as I now think of it, that her resistance was less, and that she prayed
me to desist more lovingly than was usual. We had toyed for an hour,
she had let a dish fall and smashed it, the baker rang, she took in the
bread, and declared she would not shut the door unless I promised to
leave off. I promised, and so soon as she had closed it, pulled her
into the garden parlour, having been thinking when in the kitchen, how
I could get her upstairs. Down tumbled the bread on the floor, on to the
sofa, I pushed her, and after a struggle she was sitting down, I kissing
her, one arm round her waist, one hand between her thighs, close up to
her cunt. Then I told her I wanted to fuck her, said all in favour of it
I knew, half ashamed, half frightened as I said it. She said she did not
know what I meant, resisted less and less as I tried to pull her back on
the sofa, when another ring came: it was the milkman.

I was obliged to let her go, and she ran down stairs with the milk. I
followed, she went out, and slammed the door which led to the garden,
in my face; for the instant, I thought she was going to the privy, but
opened and followed on; she ran up the steps, into the garden, through
the garden parlor, and upstairs to her bed-room just opposite to mine,
closed and locked the door in my face, I begged her to let me in.

She said she would not come out, till she heard the knocker or bell
ring; there was no one called usually after the milkman, so my game was
up, but nothing makes man or woman so crafty as lust. In half an hour
or so, in anger, I said I should go to my aunt's, went downstairs, moved
noisily about, opened and slammed the street-door violently, as if I had
gone out, then pulled off my boots, and crept quietly up to my bed-room.

There I sat expectantly a long time, had almost given up hope, began to
think about consequences if she told my mother, when I heard the door
softly open and she came to the edge of the stairs. "Wattie!" she said
loudly, "Wattie!" much louder, "he has," said she in a sub