t is full?
Because it is a pitiful house.

Why is a fortified town like a pudding? Because it's often batter'd.

Why does a tallow chandler live better than another man? Because he
lives on the fat of the land.

Why is a water lily like a whale? Because it comes to the surface to
blow.

Why is a resolution like a looking glass? Because it is so easily
broken.

Why can you never tell real hysterics from sham ones? Because in
either case it is a feint (faint).

When may ladies who are enjoying themselves be said to look wretched?
When at the opera, as then they are in tiers.

When is a bonnet not a bonnet? When it becomes a pretty woman.

Why is a vine like a soldier? Because it is 'listed, trained, has
tendrils, and then shoots.

Why is a miserly uncle with whom you have quarreled like a person
with a short memory? Because he is ever for-getting, and never
for-giving.

Why are worn-out clothes like children without parents? Because they
are left off'uns (orphans).

What is the difference between a milkmaid and a swallow? One skims
the milk, the other the water.

Why is a very demure young lady like a tugboat? Because she pays no
attention to the swells that follow her.

What smells most in a chemist's shop? The nose.

Who is your greatest friend? Your nose, because it will run for you
till it drops.

Which travels faster, heat or cold? Heat, because you can easily
catch cold.

What did the muffin say to the toasting fork? You're too pointed.

I am forever, yet was never. Eternity.

Which eat more grass, black sheep or white? White, because there are
more of them.

Why is a very amusing man like a very bad shot? Because he keeps the
game alive.

What is the height of folly? Spending your last shilling on a purse.

In what sort of family does the seventh night of the week come on the
sixth? In that sort of family where Saturday is a bath night (is
Sabbath night).

Why are clouds like coachmen? Because they hold the reins (rains).

On what supposition could a pocket handkerchief be used to build a
house? If it became-brick (be cambric).

Why did the young lady return the dumb waiter? Because it didn't
answer.

Why is a schoolboy being flogged like your eye? Because he's a pupil
under the lash.

Why does a blow leave a blue mark? Because blow, when perfect, makes
blew.

When has a man brown hands? When he's tand-'em driving.

Why is the leading horse in a wagon-team like the acceptor