rkhouses in the South of England now possess tennis-courts and
bowling-greens. It is satisfactory to note that preparations are at last
being made to receive the New Poor.

* * *

We are glad to learn that the two members of a well-known club in the City
who inadvertently took away their own umbrellas have now agreed to exchange
same, so that the reputation of the club shall not suffer.

* * *

A Warwickshire miner summoned for not sending his child to school is
reported to have pleaded that he saw a red triangle danger notice above the
word "school" and therefore kept his daughter away.

* * *

"We must have support," said the POSTMASTER-GENERAL last week. We can only
say that we always buy our stamps at one of his post-offices.

* * *

A little domestic tragedy was enacted in London last week. It appears that
a small boy, on being offered a penny by his mother, who had just returned
from the winter sales, refused it, saying that he was not allowed to accept
money from strangers.

* * *

An official of the New York Y.W.C.A. inquires whether a woman of thirty
years is young. A more fair question would be, "When is a woman thirty
years of age?"

* * *

President C.W. ELIOT, of Harvard University, says Britishers drink tea
because it feeds the brain. Our own opinion is that we drink it because we
have tasted our coffee.

* * *

So many servant-girls are being enticed from one house to another that
several houses now display the notice, "Visitors are requested to refrain
from stealing the servants."

* * *

Under a new Order public-houses will not open until seven in the evening on
Sundays. This seems to be another attempt to discourage early rising on
that day.

* * *

Two men have been arrested at Oignies, Pas de Calais, for selling stones as
coal. We fancy we know the coal-dealer from whom they got this wrinkle.

* * *

Speaking at Sheffield University last week, Sir ERIC GEDDES said he hoped
to see the day when there would be a degree of Transport. What we're
getting now, we gather, can't really be called Transport at all.

* * *

A live mussel measuring six inches has been found inside a codfish at
Newcastle. We expect that if the truth was known the mussel snapped at the
cod-fish and annoyed it.

* * *

A soldier arrested at Dover told the police he was _Sydney Carton_, the
hero of _The Tale of Two Cities_. He is supposed to be an impostor.

* * *

A market-gardener in Surrey is