soil."--_Daily Paper._

This means, we think, "Water the garden."

* * * * *

"The City views with the gravest concern the existence of places like
Didcot."--_Daily Paper._

There is reason to believe that Didcot entertains precisely similar
feelings in regard to the City.

* * * * *

COMMERCIAL CANDOUR.

"For Lightweight Motor Cycles there is no alternative to the ----
MAGNETO. Maximum Weight. Minimum Performance."--_Trade Paper._

"Reason and instinct dictate the smoking of a cigarette that will give
the minimum of pleasure at a moderate cost."--_Advt. in Evening Paper._

* * * * *

OUR PASTORAL.

"Hulloa, Melhuish," I said, "after all you had ideal weather for your
_Midsummer Night's Dream_ yesterday."

"Ideal," said Melhuish moodily.

"Really, if you'd picked the day it couldn't have been better. You want
peculiar atmospheric conditions for a pastoral, don't you? Just enough sun,
not too much wind, temperature congenial for sitting out-of-doors. You had
'em all."

Melhuish nodded.

"Your garden must be looking like fairyland too now with the roses out and
the trees in all their full summer greenery."

He nodded again.

"What a setting for the _Dream_! It drew a crowd, of course?"

"Yes, we drew the county."

I sighed regretfully. "How I wish I hadn't funked it, but with my lumbago I
never dare risk damp grass and it looked so awfully like rain in the
morning."

Melhuish suddenly got excited. "_Looked_ like rain!" he said violently. "It
_did_ rain. It rained several drops. I never saw such drops, as big as
saucers. Perhaps you didn't hear the thunder?"

"My dear bean," I said, "it was the thunder which put me off coming to see
you as _Bottom_ and Mrs. Melhuish as _Titania_ in the most idyllic
surroundings I can imagine."

"You wouldn't have seen us in any idyllic surroundings," said Melhuish. He
had relapsed into moodiness again. I could see there was something serious.

"What happened, old friend?" I said gently.

"We began rehearsing during that glorious spell of sunshine in the spring,
when the garden was a carpet of daffodils and it was a sheer joy to play
about out-of-doors. Then the weather broke for a time and we migrated to
the Parish Hall. You know our Parish Hall?"

"Quite well. A little tin place on the left from the rectory."

"That's it. It's got a platfo