man had taken it.
"What man?" asked Diana. I was trying to move the sofa at the moment and I
was inclined to be short-spoken. I said that the man who had taken it was,
no doubt, the man whom Diana had gone forth to find and bid take away our
clock. Diana said that, if the man had said that she had said that he might
take our clock away, the man was a liar. _Had_ the man said that she had
said he might take the clock away? The answer was in the negative.

Then the truth emerged. The man had stolen our clock. I had assisted the
man to steal our clock, helping him to lift it off its perch and handing
him his bowler hat as he left.

It all sounds incredible, doesn't it? But you will admit, I am sure, that
it is a thing which could quite easily happen to anyone. Isn't it?

To be quite frank, I have improved the story a bit. The clock wasn't really
stolen.

Was the man really taking it away to repair it? No; to tell you the truth
he didn't actually take it away at all. In fact, I might as well own that
no man ever came into the house while I was shifting the furniture in from
the street. And, if you want to know, I never had a clock ... nor a wife
... nor a house.

The mere fact of my pretending that there _are_ such things as semi-
detacheds for people to move into these days ought to have put you wise
from the start that the whole tale was a fabrication.

* * * * *

CURES WORTH MAKING.

(_By our Medical Expert._)

_The Times_, in its daily summary of "News in Advertisements" recently
called attention to the appeal of an invalided officer who "will be glad to
give a hundred pounds to any doctor, nerve specialist or hospital that can
cure him of occupation neurosis and writer's cramp." A careful study of
other newspapers shows that offers of handsome remuneration for cures are
not confined to those who have suffered from the War, but are made by
civilians and officials of the highest position in public life. We append a
few outstanding examples of the splendid opportunities now provided to
psycho-pathological specialists:--

A Cabinet Minister of massive physique, perfect self-confidence and
immovable determination, who has had varied experience in different
business callings and (up to a certain point) unvarying success, offers
five thousand pounds to any professor of deportment or member of the Old
Nobility in reduced circumstances who will impart to him suavity of manner,
tact and