in store--some fine music and good singing, which every recipient
enjoyed to the highest note. Thanks and compliments for such a model
evening were ornate and lavish and all left truly glad that they had
been.

* * *

FULL OF HIS SUBJECT.

[From the Evansville, Ind., Courier.]

Dr. Hamilton A. Hymes, pastor of Grace Memorial Presbyterian church, has
recovered from a recent illness, caused from a carbuncle on his neck.
His subject for Sunday night will be "Is There a Hell?"

* * *

THAT TRIOLET DRIVEL.

Will you can it or no?--
That Triolet drivel.
It irritates so.
Will you can it or no?
For the habit may grow,
And the thought makes me snivel.
Will you can it or no?--
That Triolet drivel.

D. A. D. Burnitt.

Yes, we'll can it or no,
As the notion may seize us.
If a thing is de trop,
Yes; we'll can it--or no.

For we always let go
When a thing doesn't please us.
Yes, we'll can it, or--no,
As the notion may seize us.

* * *

Sir Oliver Lodge has seen so many tables move and heard so many
tambourines, that he now keeps an open mind on miracles. We hope he
believes that the three angels appeared to Joan of Arc, as that is our
favorite miracle. Had they appeared only once we might have doubted the
apparition; but, as we remember the story, they appeared three times.

* * *

Sir Oliver may be interested in a case reported to us by L. J. S. His
company had issued a tourist policy to a lady who lost her trunk on the
way to Tulsa, Okla., and who put in a claim for $800. The adjuster at
Dallas wrote:

"Assured is the famous mind reader, and one of her best stunts is
answering questions in regard to the location of stolen property, but
she was unable to be of any assistance to me."

* * *

Some of the members of the Cosmopolitan club are about as cosmopolitan
as the inhabitants of Cosmopolis, Mich.

* * *

At the request of a benedick we are rushing to the Cannery by
parcel-post Jar 617: "Don't they make a nice-looking couple!"

* * *

ENGLISH AS SHE IS MURDERED.

Sir: After Pedagogicus' class gets through with Senator Borah's
masterpiece, it might look over this legend which the Herald and
Examiner has been carrying: "Buy bonds like the victors fought."

E