otorious authors, with a letter, which runs thus:--

"DEAR SIR,--You will be surprised at receiving a letter from
a total stranger, but your well-known goodness of heart must
plead my excuse. I am aware that your time is much occupied,
but I am certain that you will spare enough of that valuable
commodity to glance through the accompanying MS. Novel, and
give me your frank opinion of it. Does it stand in need of
any alterations, and, if so, what? Would you mind having it
published _under your own name_, receiving one-third of the
profits? A speedy answer will greatly oblige."

Would you believe it, _Mr. Punch_, not one of these over-rated and
overpaid men has ever given me any advice at all? Most of them
simply send back my parcel with no reply. One, however, wrote to say
that he received at least six such packets every week, and that his
engagements made it impossible for him to act as a guide, counsellor,
and friend to the amateurs of all England. He added that, if I
published the Novel at my own expense, the remarks of the public
critics would doubtless prove most valuable and salutary.

This decided me; I _did_ publish, at my own expense, with Messrs.
SAUL, SAMUEL, MOSS & CO. I had to pay down L150, then L35 for
advertisements, then L70 for Publisher's Commission. Other expenses
fell grievously on me, as I sent round printed postcards to everyone
whose name is in the Red Book, asking them to ask for _Geoffrey's
Cousin_ at the Libraries. I also despatched six copies, with six
anonymous letters, to Mr. GLADSTONE, signing them, "A Literary
Constituent," "A Wavering Anabaptist," and so forth, but,
extraordinary to relate, I have received no answer, and no notice has
been taken of my disinterested presents. The reviews were of the most
meagre and scornful description. Messrs. SAUL, SAMUEL, Moss & Co. have
just written to me, begging me to remove the "remainder" of my book,
and charging L23 15s. 6d. for warehouse expenses. Yet, when I read
_Geoffrey's Cousin_, I fail to see that it falls, in any way, beneath
the general run of novels. I enclose a marked copy, and solicit your
earnest attention for the passage in which _Geoffrey's Cousin_ blights
his hopes for ever. The story, Sir, is one of controversy, and is
suited to this time. _Geoffrey McPhun_ is an Auld Licht (see Mr.
BARRIE's books, _passim_). His cousin is an Esoteric Buddhist. They
love each other dearly, but _Geoffrey_, a r