-all porter and skittles. It's
the t'other vuns as gets done over vith this sort o' thing; them
down-hearted fellers as can't svig avay at the beer, nor play at
skittles neither; them as vould pay if they could, and gets low by being
boxed up. I'll tell you wot it is, sir; them as is always a-idlin' in
public-houses it don't damage at all, and them as is alvays a-workin'
wen they can, it damages too much. "It's unekal," as my father used to
say wen his grog worn't made half-and-half: "it's unekal, and that's the
fault on it."'

'I think you're right, Sam,' said Mr. Pickwick, after a few moments'
reflection, 'quite right.'

'P'raps, now and then, there's some honest people as likes it,' observed
Mr. Weller, in a ruminative tone, 'but I never heerd o' one as I can
call to mind, 'cept the little dirty-faced man in the brown coat; and
that was force of habit.'

'And who was he?' inquired Mr. Pickwick.

'Wy, that's just the wery point as nobody never know'd,' replied Sam.

'But what did he do?'

'Wy, he did wot many men as has been much better know'd has done in
their time, Sir,' replied Sam, 'he run a match agin the constable, and
vun it.'

'In other words, I suppose,' said Mr. Pickwick, 'he got into debt.'

'Just that, Sir,' replied Sam, 'and in course o' time he come here in
consekens. It warn't much--execution for nine pound nothin', multiplied
by five for costs; but hows'ever here he stopped for seventeen year. If
he got any wrinkles in his face, they were stopped up vith the dirt, for
both the dirty face and the brown coat wos just the same at the end
o' that time as they wos at the beginnin'. He wos a wery peaceful,
inoffendin' little creetur, and wos alvays a-bustlin' about for
somebody, or playin' rackets and never vinnin'; till at last the
turnkeys they got quite fond on him, and he wos in the lodge ev'ry
night, a-chattering vith 'em, and tellin' stories, and all that 'ere.
Vun night he wos in there as usual, along vith a wery old friend of
his, as wos on the lock, ven he says all of a sudden, "I ain't seen the
market outside, Bill," he says (Fleet Market wos there at that time)--"I
ain't seen the market outside, Bill," he says, "for seventeen year." "I
know you ain't," says the turnkey, smoking his pipe. "I should like to
see it for a minit, Bill," he says. "Wery probable," says the turnkey,
smoking his pipe wery fierce, and making believe he warn't up to wot the
little man wanted. "Bill," says the littl