when he felt himself equal to the task of speaking in
an articulate manner. 'I drove the old piebald in that 'ere little
shay-cart as belonged to your mother-in-law's first wenter, into vich
a harm-cheer wos lifted for the shepherd; and I'm blessed,' said Mr.
Weller, with a look of deep scorn--'I'm blessed if they didn't bring a
portable flight o' steps out into the road a-front o' our door for him,
to get up by.'

'You don't mean that?' said Sam.

'I do mean that, Sammy,' replied his father, 'and I vish you could ha'
seen how tight he held on by the sides wen he did get up, as if he wos
afeerd o' being precipitayted down full six foot, and dashed into a
million hatoms. He tumbled in at last, however, and avay ve vent; and I
rayther think--I say I rayther think, Samivel--that he found his-self a
little jolted ven ve turned the corners.'

'Wot, I s'pose you happened to drive up agin a post or two?' said Sam.
'I'm afeerd,' replied Mr. Weller, in a rapture of winks--'I'm afeerd I
took vun or two on 'em, Sammy; he wos a-flyin' out o' the arm-cheer all
the way.'

Here the old gentleman shook his head from side to side, and was seized
with a hoarse internal rumbling, accompanied with a violent swelling
of the countenance, and a sudden increase in the breadth of all his
features; symptoms which alarmed his son not a little.

'Don't be frightened, Sammy, don't be frightened,' said the old
gentleman, when by dint of much struggling, and various convulsive
stamps upon the ground, he had recovered his voice. 'It's only a kind o'
quiet laugh as I'm a-tryin' to come, Sammy.'

'Well, if that's wot it is,' said Sam, 'you'd better not try to come it
agin. You'll find it rayther a dangerous inwention.'

'Don't you like it, Sammy?' inquired the old gentleman.

'Not at all,' replied Sam.

'Well,' said Mr. Weller, with the tears still running down his cheeks,
'it 'ud ha' been a wery great accommodation to me if I could ha' done
it, and 'ud ha' saved a good many vords atween your mother-in-law and
me, sometimes; but I'm afeerd you're right, Sammy, it's too much in the
appleplexy line--a deal too much, Samivel.'

This conversation brought them to the door of the snuggery, into which
Sam--pausing for an instant to look over his shoulder, and cast a sly
leer at his respected progenitor, who was still giggling behind--at once
led the way.

'Mother-in-law,' said Sam, politely saluting the lady, 'wery much
obliged to you for this he