ny a forebodin',
it is a menace to good government and public safety, and I have told
him so. Well, I santered down into the cabin and there I found Elder
Wessel all alone. He had jest been readin' a powerful editorial that
coincided with his views exactly, and he leaned back and put a thumb
in each arm-hole of his vest and sez:

"What a glorious work the United States is doin' here in the
Philippines."

And I sez, "Yes, that is so, the United States is doin' a great and
noble work in educating and civilizing the natives, if it wuzn't for
the one great mistake she is making and duz make wherever she plants
her banner in a new country amongst a new people.

"Side by side with her schoolhouses and churches that are trying to
lift humanity heavenward the American Saloon is found lowering
humanity and undoing the work these ministers and teachers have so
faithfully tried to do."

I guess he didn't hear me, but 'tennyrate he went right on: "Oh,
yes, oh, yes, our Christian nation goes to these benighted islands,
carrying Christianity and civilization in its hand. Of course they
may not ever come up to the hite of our own perfect, matchless
civilization, but they will approach it, they will approach it."

Sez Arvilly: "Our nation won't come up to them in years and years, if
it ever duz!"

He jumped as if he had been shot; he thought we wuz alone, and sez:
"Why--why, Sister Arvilly--you must admit these savages are behind us
in knowledge."

"So much the worse for us; the sin of ignorance is goin' to be winked
at, but if we know better we ort to do better." Elder Wessel wuz
stunted, but he murmured instinctively sunthin' about our carryin' the
Bible and the knowledge of heaven to 'em.

Arvilly snapped out: "What good will that do if we carry private hells
to burn 'em up before they die? A pretty help that is! What is the use
of teachin' 'em about heaven if our civilization makes sure the first
thing it duz to keep 'em out of it, for no drunkard shall inherit
heaven. What's the use of gittin' 'em to hankerin' after sunthin' they
can't have."

The Elder wuz almost paralyzed, but he murmured instinctively sunthin'
about our duty to the poor naked heathen hanging like monkeys from the
tree tops, like animals even in their recreation. And Arvilly bein' so
rousted up and beyend reasonable reason, sez: "That's their bizness
about not bein' clothed, and anyway it is jest as the Lord started
the human race out in the Garden