down on his knees and shrieked out, "I'm an only son, Mr.
Brisket! I'll marry her, sir; I will, upon my honor, sir.--Consider my
mother, sir; consider my mother."

"That's it, sir," says Brisket, "that's a good--(hic)--a good boy;--just
put your head down quietly--and I'll have it off--yes, off--as if you
were Louis the Six--the Sixtix--the Siktickleteenth.--I'll chop the
other CHAP AFTERWARDS."

When I heard this, I made a sudden bound back, and gave such a cry as
any man might who was in such a way. The ferocious Jowler, thinking I
was going to escape, flew at my throat; screaming furious, I flung out
my arms in a kind of desperation,--and, to my wonder, down fell the dog,
dead, and run through the body!

*****

At this moment a posse of people rushed in upon old Brisket,--one of
his daughters had had the sense to summon them,--and Dobble's head was
saved. And when they saw the dog lying dead at my feet, my ghastly
look, my bloody sword, they gave me no small credit for my bravery. "A
terrible fellow that Stubbs," said they; and so the mess said, the next
day.

I didn't tell them that the dog had committed SUICIDE--why should I?
And I didn't say a word about Dobble's cowardice. I said he was a brave
fellow, and fought like a tiger; and this prevented HIM from telling
tales. I had the dogskin made into a pair of pistol-holsters, and looked
so fierce, and got such a name for courage in our regiment, that when we
had to meet the regulars, Bob Stubbs was always the man put forward to
support the honor of the corps. The women, you know, adore courage; and
such was my reputation at this time, that I might have had my pick out
of half a dozen, with three, four, or five thousand pounds apiece, who
were dying for love of me and my red coat. But I wasn't such a fool. I
had been twice on the point of marriage, and twice disappointed; and
I vowed by all the Saints to have a wife, and a rich one. Depend upon
this, as an infallible maxim to guide you through life: IT'S AS EASY TO
GET A RICH WIFE AS A POOR ONE;--the same bait that will hook a fly will
hook a salmon.

JULY.--SUMMARY PROCEEDINGS.

Dobble's reputation for courage was not increased by the butcher's-dog
adventure; but mine stood very high: little Stubbs was voted the boldest
chap of all the bold North Bungays. And though I must confess, what was
proved by subsequent circumstances, that nature has NOT endowed me with
a large, or even, I may say, an average