I jollied, as I call it, for the rest of the day. I was my mother's
delight; and thus, with a clear conscience, I managed to live on.

*****

How fond she was of me, to be sure! Being sociable myself, and loving
to have my friends about me, we often used to assemble a company of as
hearty fellows as you would wish to sit down with, and keep the nights
up royally. "Never mind, my boys," I used to say. "Send the bottle
round: mammy pays for all." As she did, sure enough: and sure enough we
punished her cellar too. The good old lady used to wait upon us, as
if for all the world she had been my servant, instead of a lady and my
mamma. Never used she to repine, though I often, as I must confess, gave
her occasion (keeping her up till four o'clock in the morning, because
she never could sleep until she saw her "dear Bob" in bed, and leading
her a sad anxious life). She was of such a sweet temper, the old lady,
that I think in the course of five years I never knew her in a passion,
except twice: and then with sister Lizzy, who declared I was ruining
the house, and driving the lodgers away, one by one. But mamma would
not hear of such envious spite on my sister's part. "Her Bob" was
always right, she said. At last Lizzy fairly retreated, and went to the
Waters's.--I was glad of it, for her temper was dreadful, and we used to
be squabbling from morning till night!

Ah, those WERE jolly times! but Ma was obliged to give up the
lodging-house at last--for, somehow, things went wrong after my sister's
departure--the nasty uncharitable people said, on account of ME; because
I drove away the lodgers by smoking and drinking, and kicking up noises
in the house; and because Ma gave me so much of her money:--so she did,
but if she WOULD give it, you know, how could I help it? Heigho! I wish
I'd KEPT it.

No such luck. The business I thought was to last for ever: but at the
end of two years came a smash--shut up shop--sell off everything. Mamma
went to the Waters's: and, will you believe it? the ungrateful wretches
would not receive me! that Mary, you see, was SO disappointed at not
marrying me. Twenty pounds a year they allow, it is true; but what's
that for a gentleman? For twenty years I have been struggling manfully
to gain an honest livelihood, and, in the course of them, have seen a
deal of life, to be sure. I've sold cigars and pocket-handkerchiefs
at the corners of streets; I've been a billiard-marker; I've been a
director (i