It isn't the blows you deal,
But the blows you take on the good old earth
That shows if your stuff is real.

--_Robert W. Service_.

BORLEIGH--"Some men, you know, are born great, some achieve
greatness--"

Miss KEEN--"Exactly! And some just grate upon you."

CHARITY

A tradesman in a certain town put a box outside his shop one day,
labeled "For the Blind." A few weeks afterward the box disappeared.

"Halloa! What's happened to your box for the blind?" he was asked.

"Oh, I got enough money," he replied. "And," pointing upward to the
new canvas blind that sheltered his shop-window, "there's the blind.
Not bad, is it?"

At a Chamber of Commerce dinner a speaker dwelt at great length upon
the suffering people of China. He suggested that all present should
give something for them. A small dry-goods merchant arose and said:

"You have made for me a feeling already that something should be
given. I move that we give three cheers for China."

"I'm sorry that my engagements prevent my attending your charity
concert, but I shall be with you in spirit."

"Splendid! And where would you like your spirit to sit? I have tickets
here for half a dollar, a dollar and two dollars."

A physician whose sole fee is the consciousness of doing good.

CHEERFULNESS

HE--"There's nothing like cheerfulness. I admire anyone who sings at
his work."

SHE--"How you must love a mosquito!"

CHICKEN STEALING

An old negro was charged with chicken-stealing, and the judge said:

"Where's your lawyer, uncle?"

"Ain't got none, jedge."

"But you ought to have one," returned the Court. "I'll assign one to
defend you."

"No, sah, no, sah, please don't do dat," begged the defendant.

"Why not?" persisted the judge. "It won't cost you anything. Why don't
you want a lawyer?"

"Well, Ah'll tell yo', jedge," said the old man confidentially. "Ah
wants ter enj'y dem chickens mahself."

"Is your husband a good provider, Dinah?"

"Yessum, he's a good providah all right, but I'se allus skeered dat
niggah's gwine er git caught at it."

"Is dem you-all's chickens?"

"Cohse dey's my-all's chickens. Who's chickens did you 'spose dey
was?"

"I wasn' s'posen' nuffin about 'em. But I will say dat it's mighty
lucky dat a chicken won' come a runnin' an' a waggin' its tail when
its regular owner whistles, same as a dog."

Rastus had caught Sambo red-handed.

"Ah'm gwine hab yo' a