then--it's all the same to _me_!

_Maria_ (_with an undutiful giggle_). It's all the same now--wherever
you go, 'cause the balloon's gone up.

_The U.O.L._ Gone up! What are you telling me, MARIA?

_Maria_. I see it go--it shot up ever so fast and quite steady, and
the people in the car all waved their 'ats to us. I could see a arm a
waving almost till it got out of sight.

_The U.O.L._ And me and this innercent waiting here on the seat like
lambs, and never dreaming what was goin' on! Oh, MARIA, however you'll
reconcile it to your conscience, _I_ don't know!

_Maria_. Why, whatever are you pitching into _me_ for!

_The U.O.L._ It's not that it's any partickler pleasure to _me_,
seeing a balloon, though we _did_ get our tea done early to be in time
for it--it's the sly deceitfulness of your _conduck_, MARIA, which is
all the satisfaction I get for coming out with you,--it's the feeling
that--well, there, I won't _talk_ about it!

[In pursuance of which virtuous resolve, she talks about nothing
else for the remainder of the day, until the unfortunate MARIA
wishes fervently that balloons had never been invented.

IN THE BUILDING.

An admiring group has collected before an enormous pin-cushion in
the form of a fat star, and about the size of a Church-hassock.

_First Soldier_ (_to his Companion_). Lot o' work in _that_, yer know!

_Second Soldier_. Yes. (_Thoughtfully_.) Not but what--(_becoming
critical_)--if I'd been doin' it _myself_, I should ha' chose pins
with smaller 'eds on 'em.

_First S._ (_regarding this as presumptuous_). You may depend on
it the man who made _that_ 'ad his reasons for choosing the pins he
did--but there's no pleasing some parties!

_Second S._ (_apologetically_). Well, I ain't denying the _Art_ in it,
am I?

_First Woman_. I _do_ call that 'andsome, SARAH. See, there's a star,
and two 'arps, and a crownd, and I don't know what all--and all done
in pins and beads! "Made by Bandsman BROWN," too!

[Reading placard.

_Second W._ Soldiers is that clever with their 'ands. Four pounds
seems a deal to ask for it, though.

_First W._ But look at the weeks it must ha' took him to do!
(_Reading._) "Containing between ten and eleven thousand pins and
beads, and a hundred and ninety-eight pieces of coloured cloth!" Why,
the pins alone must ha' cost a deal of money.

_Second W._ Yes, it 'ud be a pity for it to go to somebody as 'ud want
to take 'em out.

_Fir