acting peevish and low in his mind, and me saying little things
every now and then to chirk him up, until the shank of the evening
arrives 'long about two A.M. Then we slips over into the yards below
Riverside Drive, taking due care not to wake up no sleeping policeman on
the way. There we presently observes a freight train, which is giving
signs of getting ready to make up its mind to go somewheres.

"A freight train is like a woman. When you see a woman coming out of the
front door and running back seven or eight times to get something she's
forgot, you know that woman is on her way. And it's the same with
freights; that's why they call 'em '_shes_'. Pretty soon this here
freight quits vacilliating back and forth, and comes sliding down past
where we're waiting.

"'Here comes a side-door Pullman, with the side door open,' I says.
'Let's get on and book a couple of lowers.'

"'How do you know where she's going?' says the Kid, him being greatly
addicted to idle questions.

"'I don't,' I says; 'the point is that she's going. To-night she will be
here but to-morrow she will be extensively elsewhere; and so,' I says,
'will we. Let us therefore depart from these parts while the departing
is good,' I says.

"Which we done so, just like I'm telling you. And for some hours we
trundles along very snug and comfortable, both of us being engrossed in
sleep. When we wakes up it's another day, and the wicked city is far,
far behind us, and we are running through a district which is entirely
surrounded by scenery. If it hadn'ta been that something keeps reminding
me I ai'nt had no breakfast I coulda been just as happy.

"'Where'll we git off?' says Sweet Caps, setting up and rubbing his
eyes.

"'Well,' I says, 'we takes our choice. Maybe Albany,' I says. 'The
legislature is in special session there, and a couple of grafters more
or less wont make no material difference--they'll probably take us for
members. Maybe Rochester,' I says, 'which is a pleasant city, full of
large and thriving industries. Maybe,' I says, 'if this here train don't
take a notion to climb down off the track and go berry-picking, maybe
Chicago. Of course,' I says, 'Chi ain't quite so polished as Noo Yawk.
Chi has been called crude by some. When I think of Noo Yawk,' I says, 'I
think of a peroxide chorus lady going home at three o'clock in the
morning in two taxicabs, but when I think of Chicago I'm reminded of a
soused hired girl, with red hair, on a ram