d Kentucky Home' five. And Senator Joe Blackburn spoke
three or foah times. I never before heard Republicans called out of
their name like he done it. Senator Joe Blackburn shore proved hisse'f
a statesman that day.

"Well, it got on t'wards half past three, and while we warn't noways
uneasy we taken to wishing that Stony Bugg would report back. At ten
minutes befoah foah there warn't no signs of Stony Bugg. At five minutes
befoah foah our fellers was gettin' shore nuff worried, and jest then
the doah opened and in comes that there little Wash Burnett--alone! He
was coughing fit to kill hisse'f. His Adamses' apple was sticking out
like a guinney egg, and making about eighteen reverlutions to the
second, and them fur-apart eyes of his'n was the glassiest I ever seen,
but it was him all right. He stopped jest inside the hall and turned up
his pants at the bottom and stepped high over a shadder on the floor.
But he warn't too fur gone to walk. Nor he warn't too fur gone to vote.

"'Fore we could more'n ketch our breaths the chairman called for a
ballot and they taken it, and General Hightower was nominated--52 to
51--Captain Stonewall J. Bugg being recorded by the secretary as absent
and not voting. And while the up-state fellers was carrying on and
swapping cheers with one another, our fellers sat there jest
dumfoundered. Colonel Bud Crittenden, he was the first one to speak.

"'Major Simms being beat ain't the wust of it,' he says. 'Our committee
on irrigation is deceased. The solemn and sorryful duty devolves upon
us, his associates, to go send a dispatch to Mrs. Stony Bugg and fambly
informing them that they air widows. Stony, he must have choked hisse'f
to death on some free barroom vittles, or else he got run over by a
hawse and waggin. Otherwise he'd a' been here as arranged, and that
there little human wart of a Wash Burnett would be spraddled out on the
floor, face-down, right this very minute, a'trying to swim out of some
licker store dog fashion.'

"But jest then we heard a kind of to-do outside, and the doah flew open
and something rolled in and flattened out in the main aisle. Would you
believe me, it was Stony Bugg, more puffectly disguised in licker than I
ever expected to see.

"Two of us grabbed holt of him by the arms and pulled him up on his
feet. He opened his eyes kind of dazed-like and looked around. Colonel
Bud, he done the talking.

"'Stony,' he says, not angry but real pitiful, in his tones,