broilers and some fresh tomattuses right out of the garden and a few hot
biscuits and possibly some razzberries with cream; for I'm a simple
feeder,' he says, 'and a very little satisfies me.'

"He pokes his head inside the door and yells to a Jap to put two more
places at the table. So we reclines and indulges in edifying
conversation upon the current topics of the day and, very shortly,
nourishing smells begin for to percolate forth from within, causing me
to water at the mouth until I has all the outward symptoms of being an
ebb-tide. But this here pernicious Sweet Caps Kid, he can't let well
enough alone. Observing copious signs of affluence upon every side he
gets ambitious and would abuse the sacred right of hospitality about
half to three-quarters of an hour too soon. Out of the tail of my eye I
sees him reaching in his pocket for the educated pasteboards and I gives
him the high sign to soft pedal, but he don't mind me. Out he comes with
'em.

"'A little harmless game of cards,' he says, addressing the elderly
guy, 'entitled,' he says, 'California euchre. I have here, you will
observe, two jacks and an ace--the noble ace of spades. I riffle and
shuffle and drop 'em in a row, the trick being to pick out the ace. Now,
then,' goes on this besetted Sweet Caps, with a winning smile, 'just to
while away the time before breakfast, s'pose you make a small bet with
me regarding the present whereabouts of said ace.'

"The party with the whiskers gets up; and now, when he speaks I sees
that in spite of him wearing a brush arbor, he aint no real rube.

"'To think,' he says, more in sorrow than in anger, 'to think that I
should live to see this day! To think that me, who helped Canady Bill
sell the first gold brick that ever was molded in this country, should
in my declining years have a couple of wooden-fingered amatoors come
along and try to slip me the oldest graft in the known world! It is too
much,' he says, 'it is too much too much. You lower a noble pursuit,' he
says, 'and I must respectfully but firmly request you to be on your way.
I'll try to forgive you,' he says, 'but at this moment your mere
presence offends me. On your way out,' he says, 'kindly latch the gate
behind you--the chickens might stray off. Chickens,' he says, 'is not
exciting for steady company,' he says, 'but in comparison with some
humans I've met lately, chickens is absolutely gifted intellectually.

"'Furthermore,' he says, 'I would offer