ubber into the family safe for the change. All quiet along the Potomac.
The whole blooming city didn't have change for a century note. Can you
beat that? And they say there is no graft in Kansas. They had to go over
to the speakeasy for a change. What do you know about that? A court of a
Prohibition State going to a gin-mill for money.

"After we got through telling the court what he reminded us of and what
he looked like, we tripped out to the machine and climbed on board and
started out again. We rode around until 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning,
and I got to bed just as the help was getting out to do the chores.
Maybe you don't think that evening's amusement caused some scandal.

"Why, before breakfast the entire population was wise to the fact that
Sabrina, the pride and glory of the village, was out drinking liquor and
playing progressive hell with a couple of strange gentlemen.

"If you want anything known in one of those wopburgs, just tell it to
the butcher--it's got a town crier or a litho threesheet faded. Mother
had the info on the whole game before she got the curl papers out of her
hair. A couple of the Ladies' Auxiliary to the Herbert Killjoy Memorial
did picket duty out in front of the house all night so as to be first in
with the glad tidings.

"They galloped up like Sheridan twenty miles away. The Killjoy sisters
beat it, and I was just assuring mother that getting pinched was
considered very distingue by the upper crust of the eastern metropolis
when in prance the village selectmen followed by the deacons of the
church. When they came into view I knew the bell had rung on Sabrina,
the souse. They all came in looking like the first act of a funeral, and
Homer Jenkins, the head deaconorine, looked real solemn, and said, 'We
regret to inform you that we have found it our painful duty to dismiss
your daughter from the church.' I spoke up real gay like and said, 'Go
as far as you like, I never was a commuter anyway.'

"The selectmen were at the bat next and the main guy of that informed
father that I would have to be put under bond to keep the peace, as my
actions of yesterday in drinking the champagne wine had caused nine of
the village near-sports to get stewed on Rhinewine and seltzer, and to
please let them have the money now, as they had to pay the mayor's
salary to-morrow. Then I delivered my philippic as follows: 'If you
spangled-eyed dubs think you are going to shake me down for any more
change yo