of
this virtue, we will admit its necessity for others. After the first
flush of communion has passed, we must see in a friend things which
detract from his worth, and perhaps things which irritate us. This is
only to say that no man is perfect. With tact, and tenderness and
patience, it may be given us to help to remove what may be flaws in a
fine character, and in any case it is foolish to forget the great
virtues of our friend in fretful irritation at a few blemishes. We can
keep the first ideal in our memory, even if we know that it is not yet
an actual fact. We must not let our intercourse be coarsened, but must
keep it sweet and delicate, that it may remain a refuge from the coarse
world, a sanctuary where we leave criticism outside, and can breathe
freely.

_Trust_ is the first requisite for making a friend. How can we be
anything but alone, if our attitude to men is one of armed neutrality,
if we are suspicious, and assertive, and querulous, and over-cautious
in our advances? Suspicion kills friendship. There must be some
magnanimity and openness of mind, before a friendship can be formed.
We must be willing to give ourselves freely and unreservedly.

Some find it easier than others to make advances, because they are
naturally more trustful. A beginning has to be made somehow, and if we
are moved to enter into personal association with another, we must not
be too cautious in displaying our feeling. If we stand off in cold
reserve, the ice, which trembled to thawing, is gripped again by the
black hand of frost. There may be a golden moment which has been lost
through a foolish reserve. We are so afraid of giving ourselves away
cheaply--and it is a proper enough feeling, the value of which we learn
through sad experience--but on the whole perhaps the warm nature, which
acts on impulse, is of a higher type, than the over-cautious nature,
ever on the watch lest it commit itself. We can do nothing with each
other, we cannot even do business with each other, without a certain
amount of trust. Much more necessary is it in the beginning of a
deeper intercourse.

And if trust is the first requisite for making a friend, _faithfulness_
is the first requisite for keeping him. The way to have a friend is to
be a friend. Faithfulness is the fruit of trust. We must be ready to
lay hold of every opportunity which occurs of serving our friend. Life
is made up to most of us of little things, and many a friend