patience and
forgiveness; to the offender, an occasion for humility and frank
confession; and to both, a renewing of love less open to offence in the
future. There are some general counsels about the making up of
differences, though each case needs special treatment for itself, which
will easily be found if once the desire for concord be established.
Christ's recipe for a quarrel among brethren is: "If thy brother shall
trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him
alone; if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother."

Much of our dissension is due to misunderstanding, which could be put
right by a few honest words and a little open dealing. Human beings so
often live at cross purposes with each other, when a frank word, or a
simple confession of wrong, almost a look or a gesture, would heal the
division. Resentment grows through brooding over a fancied slight.
Hearts harden themselves in silence, and, as time goes on, it becomes
more difficult to break through the silence. Often there are strained
relations among men, who, at the bottom of their hearts, have sincere
respect for each other, and smouldering affection also, which only
needs a little coaxing of the spark to burst out again into a dancing
flame. There is a terrible waste of human friendship, a waste of power
which might be used to bless all our lives, through our sinful
separations, our selfish exclusiveness, our resentful pride. We let
the sweetest souls we have met die without acknowledging our debt to
them. We stand aside in haughty isolation, till the open grave opens
our sealed hearts--too late. We let the chance of reconciliation pass
till it is irrevocable. Most can remember a tender spot in the past
somewhere, a sore place, a time when discord entered with another they
loved, and

Each spake words of high disdain
And insult to his heart's best brother.

And in some cases, as with the friends in Coleridge's great poem, the
parting has been eternal, and neither has ever since found another such
friend to fill the life with comfort, and free the hollow heart from
paining.

There is more evil from such a state of discord than the mere loss it
is to both; it influences the whole heart-life, creating sometimes
bitterness, sometimes universal suspicion, sometimes cynicism. Hatred
is contagious, as love is. They have an effect on the whole character,
and are not confined to the single incident which causes