n aristocrat, ma'am! But an aristocrat won't take you
without a dowry!

LIPOCHKA. What do you mean, without dowry? What are you talking about? Just
take a look and see what kind of a dowry I have; it fairly hits you in the
face!

PODKHALYUZIN. Those dish-rags, ma'am? A nobleman won't take dish-rags. A
nobleman wants it in cash, ma'am.

LIPOCHKA. What of it? Dad will give cash!

PODKHALYUZIN. All right, if he will, ma'am! But what if he hasn't any to
give? You don't know about your papa's affairs, but I know 'em mighty well;
your papa's a bankrupt, ma'am.

LIPOCHKA. What do you mean, bankrupt? And the house and shops?

PODKHALYUZIN. The house and shops--are mine, ma'am!

LIPOCHKA. Yours! Get out! Are you trying to make a fool of me? Look for a
bigger goose than I am.

PODKHALYUZIN. But I have here some legal documents. [_He produces them._

LIPOCHKA. So you bought them of dad?

PODKHALYUZIN. I did, ma'am!

LIPOCHKA. Where'd you get the money?

PODKHALYUZIN. Money! Glory to God, I have more money than any nobleman.

LIPOCHKA. What in the world are they doing to me? They've been bringing me
up all these years, and then go bankrupt! [_Silence._

PODKHALYUZIN. Now suppose, Olimpiada Samsonovna, that you married a
nobleman--what will that ever amount to, ma'am? Only the glory of being a
lady, but not the least pleasure, ma'am. Please consider: ladies themselves
often go to the market on foot, ma'am. And if they do drive out anywhere,
then it's only the glory of having four horses; but the whole team ain't
worth one merchant's horse. By heaven, it ain't, ma'am! And they don't
dress so blamed superbly either, ma'am! But if, Olimpiada Samsonovna, you
should marry me, ma'am--here's the first word: you'll wear silk gowns even
at home, and visiting, and to the theatre, ma'am--and we shan't dress you
in anything but velvets. In respect to hats and cloaks--we won't care
what's in style with the nobility, but we'll furnish you the finest ever!
We'll get horses from the Orlov stud. [_Silence_] If you have doubts on the
question of my looks, then that's just as you like, ma'am; I'll put on a
dress coat, and trim my beard or cut it off, according to the fashion,
ma'am; that's all one to me, ma'am.

LIPOCHKA. You all talk that way before the wedding; but afterwards you
cheat us.

PODKHALYUZIN. May I die on the spot, Olimpiada Samsonovna! Damnation blast
me if I lie! Why should I, Olimpiada Samsonovna? D'you think we'll