rs? Don't you think I'd better, ma'am? Yet he
himself will soften them better. Ah! Or shall I go? I'll go, ma'am! Tishka!

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. Do just as you please--it's your business.

PODKHALYUZIN. Tishka! [TISHKA _enters_] Give me my old coat, the worst one
there is. [TISHKA _goes out_] As I am, they'd think I must be rich; and in
that case, there'd be no coming to terms.

SCENE V

_The same_, RISPOLOZHENSKY _and_ AGRAFENA KONDRATYEVNA

RISPOLOZHENSKY. My dear Agrafena Kondratyevna, haven't you pickled your
cucumbers yet?

AGRAFENA KONDRATYEVNA. No, my dear. Cucumbers now, indeed! What do I care
about them! But have you pickled yours?

RISPOLOZHENSKY. Certainly we have, my dear lady. Nowadays they're very
dear; they say the frost got them. My dear Lazar Elizarych, how do you do?
Is that vodka? I'll just take a thimbleful, Lazar Elizarych.

AGRAFENA KONDRATYEVNA _goes out with_ OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA.

PODKHALYUZIN. Why is it you've favored us with a visit, may I inquire?

RISPOLOZHENSKY. He, he, he!--What a joker you are, Lazar Elizarych! Of
course you know why.

PODKHALYUZIN. And what may that be, I should like to know, sir?

RISPOLOZHENSKY. For money, Lazar Elizarych, for money! Anybody else might
come for something different, but I always come for money!

PODKHALYUZIN. You come mighty blamed often for money.

RISPOLOZHENSKY. How can I help it, Lazar Elizarych, when you give me only
five rubles at a time? You see I have a family.

PODKHALYUZIN. You couldn't expect me to give you a hundred at a time!

RISPOLOZHENSKY. If you'd give it to me all at once, I shouldn't keep coming
to you.

PODKHALYUZIN. You know about as much about business as a pig does about
pineapples; and what's more, you take bribes. Why should I give you
anything?

RISPOLOZHENSKY. Why, indeed!--You yourself promised to!

PODKHALYUZIN. I myself promised! Well, I've given you money--you've made
your profit, and that'll do; it's time to turn over a new leaf.

RISPOLOZHENSKY. What do you mean by "time to turn over a new leaf"? You
still owe me fifteen hundred rubles.

PODKHALYUZIN. Owe you! Owe you! As if you had some document! And what for?
For your rascality!

RISPOLOZHENSKY. What do you mean by "rascality"? For my toil, not for my
rascality!

PODKHALYUZIN. Your toil!

RISPOLOZHENSKY. Well, whatever it may be for, just give me the money, or a
note for it.

PODKHALYUZIN. What, sir! A note! Not much, you come again