_[Silence.]_

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. Well, why don't you kiss me, Lazar Elizarych?

PODKHALYUZIN. Why, sure! Permit me, ma'am! With great pleasure! If you
please, your little hand, ma'am! _[He kisses it. Silence]_ Olimpiada
Samsonovna, say something to me in the French dialect, ma'am!

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. What shall I say to you?

PODKHALYUZIN. Oh, say anything--any little thing, ma'am. It's all the same
to me, ma'am!

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. _Kom voo zet zholi!_

PODKHALYUZIN. What does that mean, ma'am?

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. How nice you are!

PODKHALYUZIN. _[Jumping up from his chair]_ Aha! now here's a wife for you,
ma'am! Hooray, Olimpiada Samsonovna! You've treated me fine! Your little
hand, please!

_Enter_ TISHKA _with the pipe._

TISHKA. Ustinya Naumovna has come.

PODKHALYUZIN. What the devil is she here for!

TISHKA _goes out._

SCENE II

_The same and_ USTINYA NAUMOVNA

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. How are you managing to live, my jewels?

PODKHALYUZIN. Thanks to your prayers, Ustinya Naumovna, thanks to your
prayers.

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. [_Kissing_ OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA] Why, I believe you've
grown better looking, and have filled out a bit!

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. Bah, what nonsense you're chattering, Ustinya
Naumovna! Now, what struck you to come here?

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. What nonsense, my jewel! Here's what's up. Whether you
like it or not, you can't help it.--If you like to slide down-hill you've
got to pull up your sled.--Now, why have you forgotten me completely, my
jewels? Or haven't you had a chance yet to look about you? I suppose you're
all the time billing and cooing.

PODKHALYUZIN. We have that failing, Ustinya Naumovna; we have it.

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. Come, come now: just see what a nice sweetheart I got for
you.

PODKHALYUZIN. We're well satisfied, Ustinya Naumovna; we're well satisfied.

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. How could you be dissatisfied, my ruby? What's the matter
with you! I suppose you're all the time bustling around over new clothes,
now. Have you laid in a stock of stylish things yet?

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. Not much so far, and that mostly because the new
stuffs have just come in.

USTINYA NAUMOVNA. Naturally, my pearl, you can't help it; let 'em be of
poor goods, so long's they're blue! But what kind of dresses did you order
most of, woollens or silks?

OLIMPIADA SAMSONOVNA. All sorts--both woollens and silks; not long ago I
had a crape made with gold trimmings.